Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Identification, Testing & Assessment gifted adult - assessment

Hi, Howler

To the OP: Consider looking for a professional who offers therapeutic assessment to explore your underachievement. It's true that your responses are affected by your emotions and inhibitions, but if you let go of wanting to know your "real IQ" (there is no such thing... your IQ is not tattooed on your brain somewhere), the fact that *you* are part of your performance can actually provide a way to investigate *you*. And that's what you say you feel driven to do....

Sending encouragement

Hi OP,

I haven't been tested and have lived most of my adult life to date having no idea that I was any different to anyone else. I just found myself extremely frustrated with the world. The birth of my daughter, who is PG by IQ score and achievement, and the subsequent discovery that this was not unusual in my family made me realize that there are different ways of thinking and that I do actually think differently to many. Finding peers for my daughter put me in contact with a lot of gifted adults, all of whom - as someone else pointed out in an earlier post above - are individuals with incredibly diverse interests. Many of whom I have NOTHING in common with. Many of whom I adore.

In my own case I have a strong belief that if you had given me an IQ test before I had had my daughter I would not have scored as highly as I would now. Not because of an increase in ability, simply because of mindset. A traumatic upbringing and a complete conviction that I was not good enough meant that as soon as I had to actually think I figured whatever it was was too hard and so I just wouldn't try. Now I know that if I actually give it some thought - even for a moment - lots of things I previously dismissed as 'too hard' are actually very easy. So from my own experience I can see how IQ scores can move up and down depending on how you're feeling about your own capabilities.

In terms of meeting a girlfriend, well, I can only suggest getting out in the world. You connect with people or you don't - I ended up meeting my very smart husband through a temping job in a call centre early in our careers. We both now earn 6 figures. So don't discount anything.

Finally, being smart doesn't really mean much without kindness, authenticity and hard work - a small majority of the very gifted people I know don't score highly on these measures - I suspect because they've invested so much in being smart. What I have learnt? Be genuine, don't place too much stock in being smart as a measure of your value, work hard and make an effort to put yourself in places you think you'll find interesting - that will stand you in good stead.

I'm in favor of getting data.
I missed qualifying for Mensa by 1 point on their test. I had what I'm calling "chemo brain" during it and I had a hard time thinking near the end of it (my processing speed has been slow since I had chemo at 16 and I've suffered from "brain fog" for a long time from it. I recently discovered chemo brain is a known long-term side effect.)

Even though I missed by a point, it validated my feelings that I probably could have benefited from being in a gifted program as a child. Missing by one point didn't really matter... I just wanted to know where I was at.

Even though 130ish is supposedly in the socially optimal range... I still feel like it helps explain why my childhood was so difficult. It also gave me some more confidence in my abilities in face of all the underachieving I've done in my life.

I know now that even on the days when I want to cry because my brain seems to be working so slowly - I am still functioning at a pretty high level. I don't need to feel so desperate about it. I can just accept my slow days and work with what I've got.

I sort of question this assumption as well, honestly. I can't see as how being in about 2% of the general population would put one in a spot where s/he is similar enough intellectually to be socially optimal. I guess that it depends on where one lives. As an undergrad at Berkeley, I do think that I fit fine b/c the population as a whole was skewed toward brighter than average. When I've lived in areas where the general population is statistically fairly normal, I've found that 98 percentile people or those who are somewhat higher, but not necessarily PG are still a bit atypical and I wouldn't call it socially optimal.

IMHO, if the only factor we're taking into account is IQ score, socially optimal would be more like 110-115: bright enough to seem smart, but not so much so as to appear strangely different. This, again is assuming that one lives in a statistically average location.

If you want to get into Mensa in the U.S., just take the GMAT if you're good at those kinds of tests. They will take the top 5%.

I can't help you with the underachievement thingy.

I would caution you against putting all your eggs in this particular basket.

I learned my IQ at age 17. In some ways it made validated and made sense of a lot of frustrations/impatience I had when trying to interact with other people. On the other hand, it also left me feeling more isolated and alone. Being "off the charts" can feel very very lonely.

I agree with others that counseling isn't a bad idea. It might help to sort through exactly what you are looking for and why.

Nothing wrong with wanting to get your IQ tested. I love data, I totally get it. But it is unlikely to solve any problems you have and may even present some unexpected new ones.

Best wishes, whatever you decide!