I wish I saw this yesterday! Yesterday was our first ever report card day too.
We made a BIG deal out of it. Lots of hugs and "I'm so proud of you's." We also went out for ice cream to celebrate.
One of the things that dd knows for sure is that she is valued for herself, not her achievements. We've always been careful to comment on her character more than her achievements and to give love at her least deserving moments.
I think she was surprised that we made such a big deal out of her report card, mostly because she has never had one before. We also made a big deal over my last raise at work and my husbands promotion at his work. It's good to celebrate the positive. I think as long as you are focusing on all aspects of the child, it will be known that grades aren't the only important thing.
Another thing I want to mention. DD is given a green (good), yellow (borderline), or red (awful) slip at the end of each school day. We don't celebrate or reward those. DD is expected to bring home a green slip each day just as I am expected to obey the speed limit when driving each day. Green slips are (generally) neutrally commented on. I see you have a green slip, be sure to put that away in your desk. (She is keeping them because she wants to.) Or a smile and a nod. Or an "of course." My mother is kind of horrified that we aren't gushing over them but really we want to instill in her that doing the right thing is often it's own reward.
