I, too, have a child with avg WMI and PSI indices although a little higher than your ds'. My dd9 has somewhat higher VCI scores than your ds and somewhat lower PRI scores, although it is a similar pattern. Her VCI/PRI index scores are less consistent, though b/c they vary from 19-12, for instance, on VCI rather than clustering around one another. Her WMI and PSI scores are the ones that have less of a spread than your ds. My dd does not have Asperger's though.
We, too, have seen a lot of emotional damage based on schooling experiences up to the year before last. Last year wasn't terrible, but I still feel like having her home might be a better fit for her emotional wellbeing. I'm trying to find a way to make that work.
You mention wanting to homeschool your son as well. Is that a possibility financially and otherwise? (You mention being divorced, so I don't know if you are needing to work outside of the home.) Could you consider some mix of hs and community college courses?
I'd agree with the others that an ED classroom doesn't seem to be the place for a twice exceptional child unless there is something else significant going on. Even if there is, it seems like there is more of a focus on his weaknesses than his strengths, which isn't good for his self image.
I don't think that you did anything wrong in not noting something being different about your boy earlier on. Different doesn't necessarily mean dysfunctional nor does it mean that he needs intervention or treatment for his differences unless they are distressing to him or making it such that he can't function. Perhaps a better learning environment fit might make those things that appear to need fixing right now again appear to be fine variations on personality.
