Hi amazedmom. First, I haven't read all the posts under yours so I might be duplicating. It seems that she is teetering on understanding there is a difference and I don't think there is anything wrong with helping her understand this while making sure she doesn't see it as better than. My daughter realized early on that she was different and really started talking about it when we put her in a social preschool. It was definitely part of the problem ... not that she understood she was different but more how she was trying hard to fit in and was changing herself to do so. When the topic comes up we always use it as an opportunity to explain how everyone has strengths and weaknesses and we are all unique and special in our own ways. DD might be advanced and able to do more academically than some of her age mates (I will explain 'some of' in a minute) but when it comes to the more standard 3 year old activities: riding bikes, playing on the swingset, etc she is far from advanced. Though she is riding her bike now it took forever for her to really try and she still insists on being pushed on the swing while her friends at school are able to swing with no assistance and even have pointed it out to her at some point.
Just my own personal experience, but from what you described you might want to locate a preschool environment that is more than social. We moved DD into an academic environment and she is flourishing and though the school is not a 'gifted' school, we have hit the jackpot with gifted kids. It makes sense that we would since the school is all taught in Spanish and is 2 years ahead of regular schools. So the 3 year olds are doing Kindergarten work which in itself not really a challenge for my DD but the fact that it is all in Spanish it works. Most of the parents that seek out this type of environment are looking to challenge their children. Is DD the most advanced of the kids in the class? I really have no idea nor does it matter. For me I would like to stay clear of the gifted label as long as possible and as long as we are happy and thriving in the school we will stay away from it. The nice thing is the school is very open to moving up DD when she becomes bored. They have made many comments about her intellect and abilities so I feel confident that they get she is special and are excited to challenge her.
Are you looking to put your daughter in any type of preschool this next year and if so do you have many options in your area? I, personally, feel preschool is a great opportunity for them to build their social skills away from us, the parents, and start to come to terms with their uniqueness. It was hard for me at first as she would come home upset about how her 'best friend' was mean to her and etc but as the year has progressed she is starting to understand that she shouldn't take it personally.
Off to drop DD at school and by the way ... glad to see you changed your signature.
