Thanks everyone. I've missed this forum. I appreciate the thoughtful comments and examples and have been reading through the linked posts. We moved to a new state a few years ago and my oldest was doing well in a private school there and my youngest had really no hope of getting any accommodation so I just let it be at school and stopped trying to think about it. We moved again last summer and now I feel like there are opportunities here to advocate. I guess I'm rusty though. So I'm back on here and realize how much I miss the discussions that helped me so much when my oldest (14y) was little.
I agree that "calling out" will get me nowhere as I am calmer. In reality, I agree that "pushing kids too far/fast in math" or whatever subject could cause them not to like it anymore. The problem is that we haven't determined what "too far/fast" is in my DD case and also I don't think she is considering the negative effect of slowing a child down. I actually think she is a good teacher and that she cares about my daughter overall. She has gone out of her way on health related issues. Its actually part of why these comments were a bit of a surprise to me.
As far as my DD's wishes...she is not one to pick up a textbook after school but will talk for hours with her dad about math stuff if given a chance. When she was younger she was obsessed with dream box and prodigy but she dropped dream box when she moved to the older modules which weren't as fun and prodigy stopped being a challenge years ago. We tried beast academy a couple years ago and she obsessed over the puzzles but wasn't interested in just doing math. And yet, if you do get her started doing something...like IXL, she can go for hours. Generally she would love to work at her own pace but doesn't want to do it after school as she will still have to sit through math at school. She dislikes her school math class which is very slow. Her sister suggested to her that she could do 7th/8th grade online this summer and then go into algebra next year and now she really wants to do that. I have no idea if that is possible, who to do it with and if the school would go for it. I looked at CTY and they have pre-algebra 1 and pre-algebra 2 and I have no idea if that corresponds to 7th and 8th grade but seems to be all there is after 6th. There will be other 7th graders in algebra next year but they are already in a 7/8th compacted class right now.
My only wish is for her to be more engaged with math and a bit more challenged as I've seen how natural it is for her and how she gets into it. I want her to have a solid understanding of math and have no need to "push her" but I feel like she deserves a chance to learn. Right now her career aspiration is to be an astrophysicist. Who knows but I suspect that she will head down some scientific/engineering type path.
