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Ditto what aeh posted. You've received great advice, I'll just add a brief roundup of resources from old discussion threads...
1) Unfortunately, in school and elsewhere, gifted kids may be subject to negative commentary born of myths about giftedness. Inflated and unrealistic expectations placed on gifted children may lead to, or fuel, anxiety and perfectionism. It is possible that with having a support team that understands, validates, and affirms their giftedness without undue pressure to perform, they will be able to create realistic goals and expectations for themselves, and become less vulnerable to other's expectations.
2) This resource-rich article on the Davidson database interviews Thomas Greenspon and discusses the relationship between anxiety and perfectionism. One section provides a list of links to several books and articles which may be of interest.
3) There are books which show readers how to free themselves from thought patterns which may not be serving them well. A book which seems to understand perfectionism very well and which many find supportive is What To Do When Good Enough Isn't Good Enough. Another book your DD might like is Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good. While insightful, these are written gently for kids, in a style that is fun and engaging.
4) The American Psychological Association, Magination Press, has published a book "Understanding Myself: A kid's guide to intense emotions and strong feelings" (2010). Chapter 7 is titled "Anxiety", while "Fear" is the title of Chapter 8.
5) Perfectionistic tendencies may be a sign of developing a fixed mindset rather than a growth mindset. One aspect or application is that gifted kids may stop taking appropriate risks in order to always be "right" or always be "smart" or never be "wrong", and this may work against them. The concept is nicely summarized in these videos: - Ashley Merryman & Po Bronson: The Myth of Praise (video no longer available on youtube, but this article provides a summary of their book, NurtureShock) - Carol Dweck: Teaching a Growth Mindset (link- ) Parents may wish to read the book Mindset by Carol Dweck for tips on promoting a growth mindset.
