Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school Boredom = class clown --- solution???

One approach that sometimes help is to flip the situation in the teacher's head. Instead of *you* trying to make her do extra work, work on re-framing it as *her* making her own life easier. If she gives him different material that engages him, *she* doesn't have to deal with disruption and problem behaviours.

Sometimes it helps to propose it as an experiment: "let's try this for a week and see if we get different behaviours". It may also be helpful for you to send in your own materials during that trial, to make sure he is getting the best opportunity to be engaged. If she sees with her own eyes that it helps and makes her job easier, she's more likely to take the idea on as her own.

The said, it sounds like your DS is being pretty seriously disruptive, in ways that cause problems for the other kids too. This is not a positive for anybody, especially him. It's also pretty common for a really bored gifted kid, though. So you don't want to be too hard on him - but you also need to be pretty clear that these behaviours aren't ok. So show him you understand and you don't blame. prove it by explaining how you are going to try to fix the problem. Ask him for his ideas on what he could do differently to handle the most problematic times (circle and nap). Let him see what you are going to do for him, and what you expect from him in return.

But bottom line, I'm with Dude. What these kids need most is flexibility. If there is an absolute unwillingness to bend on anything, then the school is likely to spend all their energy trying to force your square peg into their round hole, bashing off his sticky-out bits rather than enjoying and nurturing them. And on a more practical note, I've learned with regret that forcing a non-napper to lie still and seething probably contributed far too much to souring my DD on school for years to follow.

eta - meant to mention: most teachers take "he's bored" as an insult to their teaching, not a description of the child. It's best to avoid that word, and just describe behaviours and what pre-empts them in other circumstances. "How to get him more engaged" seems to be a less fraught expression.