Who would've thought we were going to find more support at a public school than a "gifted" school!
Willsher21, there's no set rule re private school = better school or public school = less flexibility etc - each school, public or private, usually has it's own particular personality and vision. The key is finding out as much information (real information vs advertising) before enrolling, and then remaining flexible yourself in being able to acknowledge if a school is not a good fit and move on when possible, or adapt as much as possible when there is no option to move on.
You're looking for a new school for your dd for next year, which is exactly what I'd be doing. The only caveat I'd add is - you mention a lot about how your dd isn't being noticed. What you're looking for is an appropriate education, not necessarily being singled out as amazing. Your dd says she's never called on in class, but do you know that for a fact? I'm not saying it isn't true, just trying to mention be sure you keep focused on a realistic expectation - that your dd is in an environment where there is opportunity to learn at an appropriate level and pace, and hopefully in that environment *all* students will have an opportunity to be challenged, called on, recognized and shine.
BTW did I mentioned that in the current "gifted" school they do not like girls in math classes? the girls are assigned to science because "they don't want them to feel uncomfortable in an all male classroom".....
Aside from the glaring ridiculousness of this concept... it appears from this statement that the school isn't terribly willing to work with you as a parent (and perhaps not with any parents?). The one thing that many private schools offer that's attractive to many of us parents is access to teachers - as well as teachers who are willing to listen to parents and an atmosphere where parent input is valued. Not placing your child appropriately or challenging her appropriately is only one part of the equation here re this school - I'd be concerned about their attitude toward parent input too. And not allowing girls to accelerate in math!
Best wishes finding a better school fit for next year,
polarbear
