It sounds like a rather chaotic daycare, rather than a well-run preschool. Your son may indeed be inappropriately hitting, but getting a chaotic daycare to implement a successful strategy may not be easy. With your description, and particularly that you only need a few hours a day, I'd start looking for a new preschool (and not a daycare), even if only for a few months.
When my older son was in the three's and four's class at school, they also did one letter a week, worked on counting, etc., but his teacher had the time and energy to pull him aside to play sight word games or read books (he was the only reader).
Also, if you do look for a new place, I'd recommend looking specifically for play-based. Much more opportunity for boys to get their energy out, and there's still plenty of opportunity (in our experience) for learning.
