With my first DS (crazy gifted/2E), his first kindergarten was a nightmare. He was really young and small for his grade but very advanced academically. I switched him a few months into K bc he was clearly distressed, wetting his pants and telling me the teacher gave hugs to the Good Kids, but he didn't get hugs because he was one of the Bad Kids. When I talked to the teacher, she told me that DS "didn't put away his Crayolas, the first time he was asked" and that I should pray (yes, really!) for his behavior with him before each school day (at a public school). So I transferred him to a half-day kindergarten with a really kind teacher, classroom pets, and emphasis on friendship/creativity/learning the routines. Probably not ideal in terms of academics, but he was happy. At the end of the year, his teacher told me she thought he'd be president some day, and that he was the brightest child she'd ever taught.
With DS2E#1--he always had straight As and blew the top out of every state achievement test in every area, without fail. However, his report cards always stated he was "off task." I didn't know then what I know now (I went on to get a degree in gifted ed and taught), but I knew enough to know that didn't make much sense. Used to beg them to just give him MORE and keep him busy. He was a very busy kid and academically motivated, and more would have helped, because he was so quick and interested.
With second DS2E#2 (also 2E, but different profile), K went okay, good teacher and fewer complaints (although he would NOT "color" and preferred drawing, socializing, etc.). Not much academic learning but a fairly happy kiddo, despite being light-years ahead of curriculum in reading and mathematical reasoning. He is not a "give me more" kid, though, because he is so happy in his own head and does not prefer to do a lot of worksheets.
Second grade year (with DS2E#2) was our horrible year--it's interesting to see others have had the same experience. In our district, anyhow, it seems that second grade is really a repeat of first grade, trying to get everyone more "even" in their skills and abilities. DS spent a lot of time just sitting and waiting, it was a highly traditional classroom (no differentiation, the teacher didn't believe in that), and a lot of time making puppets out of erasers that he'd play with while he spent every recess sitting on the steps (punishment for talking). A *lot* of time. He is one to invent little games and will entertain himself for hours.
I think *so much* depends upon the teacher's educational philosophy and approach toward the students. My kids' (public) elementary school is part of the PYP program (pre-IB, inquiry-based learning) and it was an excellent fit for the most part. I also think a lot of early success in school depends on the child. Some kids are happy just being the top dog and others may wither on the vine.
I wish both of my sons had more academic challenge in their earlier schooling. Naively, I was under the impression that everything was (more or less) okay because they enjoyed school and the teachers were communicative and positive (mostly). Middle school for DS#2 has so far been pretty nightmarish, and if I'd had better information about DS and his ability to adapt, learn, and progress, it might have been a little less of an ordeal.
I guess I'm saying: whatever you decide to do, keep your eye on your child and make sure he is learning something that puts him in the zone. I'm not sure it matters exactly what that is, but they need to learn how to learn what someone else wants them to learn.
