Thanks for the support. It really wasn't awful for very long; it just caught me with my guard down. It definitely is a stark reminder that the general population's understanding of gifted kids (as well as assumed parental motivations for enrolling in a gifted school) is quite low.
was it disparaging, tinged with jealously, or just a matter-of-fact convenient factoid to share?
Mostly a sense of amazement, possibly a tinge of jealousy, but it was most likely intended to be a conversation starter. I think she sensed how uncomfortable it made me feel, though, and the next time she introduced me to someone, she used a completely different subject to break the ice.
Don't be surprised if other parents may seek you out over the years to discuss any aspect of giftedness. Including this birthday girl's family... Your son's excellent rapport with this child seemed to indicate that the child may be on his wavelength... as in, may be gifted, also?
I told her that my kid doesn't usually take a shining like that to another kid unless they share creativity in play together. It worked well as a transition into talking about giftedness in general and how it might apply to her daughter. It sounds like she has a few "tells" that her mom hadn't previously considered. She thought her teachers would bring up giftedness if it were relevant, so I got to discuss how it's often not on a teacher's radar and how parents are usually better at seeing it. We also talked about gifted services available at her school district. So I was successfully able to deflect the conversation away from my kid and his new school...
When I told my spouse about the whole encounter later, she laughed (in empathy) and said, "Oh, you got the 'freak show on display' thing!" She and her parents had been through this exact situation many times when she was growing up. So not a lot has changed.
