The point is
very well-made that for the younger generation of people-- particularly young women-- the IMAGE of perfection that social media bombards them with is a powerful, narcotic, and TOXIC force.
Those with perfectionistic children should read that very sobering and heartbreaking account.
I know kids like that girl. So does my DD.
I see echoes of what my DD and her friends have gone through in their first year at Uni in that write-up. It's very troubling.
Colleges may know that they have a "suicide problem" but precious few of them are doing much to stem the tide.
THIS is
the ultimate destination on the college-admissions crazy train. I firmly believe that. NO kind of real-life experience can possibly match the expectations that are generated along that route. The pressure placed on college entrants now is downright scary.
Never forget that no matter how talented, how gifted--
teenagers are really still so young, in so many ways. They are still children, and we're (meaning as a culture) placing a pretty heavy burden on them, and then reinforcing it with social media and the subscription to college admissions mania. Think about what that admissions game is like now-- truly think about it. NOTHING is ever "enough" and kids as young as-- well, even some of the early elementary kids whose parents are here, for example-- are already into "managing" their children's
resumes for this purpose. We do so by editing what they show the world of themselves-- by picking and choosing those things which show them to best advantage, the closest to "perfect" that can be presented as a collage, with all of the less-stellar and average (or, heaven forbid, below average) bits edited OUT. Think about super-scoring, even, for an example of what I'm driving at there.
We've managed their growing up years by grooming them to APPEAR always at their best, emphasized high performance to them, ensured that all is "within reach" all of the time both academically and otherwise, meaning that success or failure is ALWAYS a matter of personal effort or ability. Their lives are engineered to teach them that perfect is both attainable-- and REQUIRED. That if they don't achieve at high levels, it's a failure and that it's because of something wrong with THEM, since, after all, their lives are often engineered so that this is fundamentally more or less TRUE.
Then they enter college and
it just isn't so. The most capable and insightful among them are the most prone to unraveling at that point, because existential dissonance is so extreme for them in particular. That gap has grown a LOT larger than it was in the 1960's-1990's when their parents were growing up.
No wonder a few pithy "it's okay" platitudes and 40 minutes once a week with a counselor that grew up in another era don't do much for this problem.
