His Kindergarten teacher was a completely different situation and she was the ultimate reason we decided to leave the school. He stopped asking questions at home (which I didn't realize just how many questions he asks until he wasn't asking *any*), he stopped caring about anything, he was dumbing himself down to fit in better. He would tell us school was "fine" but he was bored and he like his teacher "fine" but she wouldn't teach him anything. We started having more frequent tantrums and general behavior problems. Finally, he started with screaming that he didn't want to go to school, to please let him stay home or make them teach him real things.
Mamaandmore: you just described exactly what is happening with my DS8. I've continually asked myself if him not asking questions, seemingly less bright is just normal development, a phase, a direct result of being unchallenged in school etc. This summer has been soooooo nice.....no tantrums, no bursting into tears b/c his creation fell apart, not as much whining, using his manners, just plain old much nicer kid to be around. It really scares me to think about sending him back to school in a month and returning to all the stress...it really affects the entire household having to deal with him each evening. Also, I have a son going to K who is more advanced in some ways than DS8 was in K. DS's K year was miserable. I should have pulled it then.
I listened to all the people who said "he has to learn to be bored." "School isn't exciting." "He has to learn to deal with it now to prepare for adulthood." I kept thinking "He's only 5, or 6 or 7, should learning still be exciting? Shouldn't learning something new always be exciting?" "What is the real lesson he is learning?" I read a post by a mom who said that her DD finally told her "if real life is this boring and unrewarding, I'm going to commit suicide now." The mom said the DD was serious.
These topics are difficult b/c what we are all discussing are degrees along a continuum from best--->good--->ok---->do no harm---->poor----->bad---->worse---->abuse. Of course the advice will be different for each of those points AND will be different for each kid. My friend's kid has NO problem showing what she knows, reviewing stuff she already knows, no problem with not being challenge (same GAI but VCI/PRI reversed) but those things are killing my son. It's not a gifted issue but a personality issue. Well it's a gifted issue in that he's not being challenged to his ablility/pace of learning.
This year was the first time I felt the teacher really "got" my son. But still he wasn't challenged the way he needs to be. I don't have the achievement testing, which I need, to go head to head with the school and am having difficulty getting it. I wonder if I'm giving up too quickly if I decide not to send him back to school. Maybe I need to really fight this one last time......sigh.....
