The idea of children leaving the nest at 18 is like, sooooo 1960s, man.
Two years ago DD9 was having anxiety about leaving home, which was probably made more acute by the fact that we were openly discussing a grade skip, which would push her out a year early. We assured her she's welcome as long as she likes. We discussed how it's common for kids to live at home while attending university, and we'd probably prefer it due to costs. We discussed how adults have transitioned to the working world and still lived at home until they were comfortable with leaving, and how it benefits all parties. DD then decided that she could still move into a house on our street after that, as there were some available.
Thus assured, she's currently planning on how to shave another year off of high school.
Our kids also thought they would be very happy living at home and going to our local university for the first part of college… when they were 9. Now that my EG ds is actually in high school - no way. He's had the experience of both going to summer programs at universities outside of our area and he's seen and heard enough at this point to realize that the programs offered at our local uni don't match up in terms of intellectual challenge or intellectual fun to what he'll have the opportunity to experience elsewhere (provided he gets scholarship $ to send hiim elsewhere lol!). Anyway, everyone's mileage will vary based on local opportunities… but fwiw, the kids who are craving more *now* in lower school are going to be the kids who quite likely might not to want to opt for the local uni when they are done with high school.
greenlotus, I really do understand and feel for what you're up against. We were lucky in that we were able to find a private school that provided an overall curriculum that was ahead by one grade level (and more in some instances) and met ds' needs - not perfectly, not an ideal solution, but it was "better enough" for our ds. He will also tell you he's never wanted to grade-skip, and is very happy with having subject-accelerated only. In subjects where he wasn't subject accelerated he either found challenge or was bored, but he is a kid who accepted that staying in his grade (and possibly even with a skip) he wasn't going to find intellectually challenging work across the board, and he also is a kid who likes having some classes that are easy (possibly because he's 2e and has to work extra-hard in some areas). The reality is the only academic settings where I've seen him truly satisfied and totally happy are in his 2-year accelerated subjects and in the summer programs he's attended at universities.
OTOH, to be honest, I'd also have to say that there hasn't been an ideal solution for my "not-so-gifted" dd in school either. And in spite of being "not-so-gifted" (per IQ etc tests), she's my kid who found an uber-motivation in early middle school and is absolutely soaring and begging for more subject acceleration and handling it very well.
polarbear
