wow - I feel I really touched a nerve with my comments. Please know I wasn't trying to minimise anyone's experience, or be especially dim (although I am often commenting at 2am after waking for the wee one). Personally I had a horrible experience with school I have never recovered from and I have already withdrawn DD from preschool because of gifted issues, I'm also really struggling with navigating the starting school process.

I did type out a very long response to explain where I was coming from but it wasn't in any way eloquent.

I just want to say I get it - I understand the self selection etc, I feel like a pregnant woman who keeps coming across every hideous birth story around and then later on hears all the positive ones no one bothered sharing.

Thanks in particular to aeh and polar bear - I appreciate your perspectives