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As we live in Europe, the IAS won't come into play
Please know that IAS is a set of publications which can be utilized anywhere. If local schools are not utilizing it, they may not be aware of it. Parents can help raise awareness, both in the USA and elsewhere.

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I am still really conflicted what to ask for
This may be when the exploration, fact-gathering, and discussion of collected items following the IAS checklist may be most helpful. It helps replace feelings with facts, moving from subjective to more objective decision making. It also helps document aspects considered at this point in time.

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he is adamant he wants to attend the school his papa teaches at
Is that the school he would skip into the 5th grade at? Student preference is one element taken into consideration in the IAS.