I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. DD had a teacher in 3rd grade who also was very focused on the negative and seemed to ignore the positive. We tried and tried to help DD get along better in that classroom but basically nothing we tried worked (although we were treading relatively lightly in hopes that 1) that would be enough and 2) the school would let her continue there the following year, with a different and presumably better teacher). So since nothing we did worked (except going to a different school), I guess my advice isn't to be taken too seriously, but I would definitely try to think about how to handle the next meeting and whether it might be helpful to point this stuff out in an indirect way--like, "I'm confused about the ratings because my impression was that DS is doing well in math and spelling." At least you might get some kind of explanation of why she is being so negative, and might be able to figure out something to help DS get along with her better. Although I think this is very difficult to do in a polite and cheerful manner when you think the teacher is being unreasonable.
Thanks DBat. The good side is that, according to DS, teacher is nice to him. And that is the most important thing to me. He has no idea how she apparently really feels - thank God b/c he's very sensitive and perceptive. So, I guess it's not really a problem, it just saddnes me, that's all. And just makes me wonder how she can't see any giftedness in the kid who is performing at the highest level in her class (but she apparently can see plenty on the behavioral disorder scale). He is the only kid at his readng level in the class and has been the only one all year. He is also one of the only ones as high as he is in math problem solving. He consisitently seeks challenge.
are there any significant consequences to the ratings (such as affecting your DS's ability to remain in the gifted program)?
You know, this is a good question .. and, while I think it does not (as long as DS has the scores, which he does with both IQ and achievement - both alone and together qualify him), this may be a way to tactful way to point out what the teacher appears to be missing.
