I am assuming your child is already seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist?
My DS14 had a major problem with anxiety in 6th grade. His had to do with the amount of work, and level self motivation the class expected. In addition he was expected to work in groups a lot, and there were many clashes of egos. (Groups of gifted 12 year old boys who all think they are right makes for challenging dynamic.) He was not the only kid to show anxiety problems in his class. (One of the others was eventually homeschooled.) We worked with a psychologist, and played up the fact that he only a few months left in that particular school. As he was already in an advanced class, I didn't push the academics or his grades until this year. The teacher made some modification on the homework for him. His psychologist taught him some techniques that helped him when he melted in school, and we worked with his teacher on allowing him to take a breather when he started to melt down. He was having screaming fits in class. I still had to take him home from school, several times in the middle of the day but we made it though. (I'd better not mention the time I came to pick him up and the principal had him cornered.) At this point he is a freshman in H.S. and hasn't had an anxiety related issues since the middle of 7th grade.
I would seriously consider an different school or homeschooling. It sounds like this school is not working with you. I am particularly concerned that there is bullying going on. Did anything happen to those 3 girls? Are they still keeping it up. I find that teachers & administrators like to believe the stories from the "bullies" in these situations because they are often very good at lying/pulling the wool over the adults.
Why are you dropping your daughter off at the principals office? Is this a public school or private? Does he have an 504? Why would the school you are checking out talk with her current school at this time? Are they asking for references?
