How have others encouraged a good life balance in their teens, particularly girls?
On the one hand gifted kids may sometimes gather lots of interesting information and find it difficult to pare down. There is an art to paring down so that a reader can tell that much more went into a report and that the report represents just a sampling of what the student learned on the project. One technique here may be to keep the full report, then create another document in which the student pares down the work. In this way, all the fascinating research is still there for the student's own benefit... plus it can be drawn on to add selected content back into the report for continuity if needed (eliminating the potential panic of something being over-edited and becoming choppy).
On the other hand, schools may apply huge pressure to perform, stating/implying this may make all the difference as to which college/career a child will be prepared/suited for... so it may seem to a child like the weight of the world is on their shoulders. A child may feel like they are dissenting, being non-compliant, bucking the system, and only hurting themselves, or setting themselves up to let their parents down... when in fact they are establishing healthy boundaries and sustainable balance in their lives.
Under a guise of "differentiation", gifted & high-performing students may also in some cases be held to a different standard of output (rather than being instructed in advanced, complex, challenging curriculum). Their "challenge" may be in the form of being required to out-produce others (and even their own capacity) in order to achieve a grade.
This is sometimes called differentiated task demands, and can cause burn-out. Internalizing their own best sense of a balanced life may be something a teen needs to decide for him-/herself in order for it to stick. Here are two books which seem to have a good approach which some may describe as showing the reader what they can be free of, because it is not serving them well.
A book which seems to understand perfectionism very well and which many find supportive is "What To Do When Good Enough Isn't Good Enough". Another book you might like is "Perfectionism: What's Bad About Being Too Good". While insightful, these are written gently for kids, in a style that is fun and engaging.
With any of these books it may be wise for a parent to pre-read and decide if it seems to be a helpful tool for their child. Wishing you, your family, and your daughter all the best with this.
