Academic talents are noticeable--I don't think there is anyone who knows DS in school who doesn't have an inkling of how unusual he is. Yet I do not particularly want him feeling celebratory about it--I think that often leads to a kind of conceitedness that offends others.
What I am proud of is that DS is starting to enjoy, understand, and use all the things his brain can do without the need to brag or hurt others' feelings with comparisons or seek affirmation from outside himself. He can know and enjoy things about himself without demanding a big fuss from the world about it.
And yes, I do dislike the fawning over athletic talent as well. All the celebrating of self that goes on seems to be a vestige of the fakey self-esteem of the 1970s. No thanks.
DeeDee
This is perfectly put, I think. Thank you, DeeDee, for stating so succinctly what I was having trouble putting into words here.
DD is one of two PG kids in her school circle. The other is a self-promoting, conceited "let me tell you how awesome I am... have I mentioned this thing that I've done/accomplished?" type. The other child is extremely abrasive and NOT well-liked by others as a result.
DD can't even wrap her head around that kind of behavior. It's hurtful to others, and she knows it instinctively. Making others uncomfortable or being the cause of insecurity in them is anxiety-producing for her, too. It makes her feel terrible to do that to others. She is generally quite careful. If that is "hiding" then she figures -- so be it.
There is something to be said for being able to KNOW the right answer or get 100% without TELLING everyone else.
