Homeschooling is not out of the question. It just isn't ideal for our family. If that compromise needs to be made, though, we CAN make it.
I'm genuinely less concerned about fully meeting her academic needs, and more concerned with her being placed a stable and survivable environment with a tolerant teacher. Both my wife and I would have qualified for DYS as kids (we were both tested and identified by our school psychiatrists with IQs significantly higher than the DD's WPPSI score). I was placed in a public gifted school, but the curriculum there was pretty conventional, and my wife just muddled through the standard public school system with no accommodation or acceleration. We both felt like we had good and bad years, and we both went on to pursue advanced degrees in our fields.
Neither of us felt wildly under served. The biggest problem that we've had so far is that DD's teachers are so committed to early identification and intervention that every out-of-the-ordinary thing that she does draws a huge (negative) reaction.
We're not really trying to raise the next Terence Tao. We would much prefer that our DD take a more conventional path. Ironically, though, Dr. Gross is one of the folks our neuropsych has been in touch with about DD. She advised homeschooling.
I'd probably go the homeschooling route too. While you as parents were able to get through public school without too many issues, the school system then and now were far too different to take the risk and hope that your daughter will be ok as well.
Personally, I look at where will my kids be HAPPY. If your daughter isn't enjoying school and gets in trouble and it's just not a good scenario overall how would things be if you were homeschooling and she could explore whatever interest she may have since she obviously won't have problems with the grade standards?
Now, I admit I am a little biased because I am seriously considering homeschooling our boys (4.5 and 3) K and 1st (if not longer). Though our reasons are a bit different. Aside from the need to up the academics for them, 4.5 will do better at home given his health issues and with the 3 year old we're tackling high functioning autism with giftedness and my hopes with homeschooling is get him to function well socially while at the same time be able to skip if needed. The way things are now he'd be held back and that just wouldn't work for him.
So, as long as it is a possibility for you, I'd really look into homeschooling.
