My oldest was very intense when she was little. I learned that I could not overstimulate her by packing too much into one day, or she'd end up in meltdown. Often we'd do a couple of things in the morning, come home where I would tell her she needed quiet time and then we'd head back out in the afternoon for more activities. Without that unwind time by herself in her room, she'd end up crying and just unable to handle much of anything.
So if you can find ways to help her "center" and get away from the stimulus, she may handle stressors better.
That being said, when my daughter was about six, she decided that she'd escalate the drama to kicking the door. I told her if she kicked the door again, she would lose the door and not have one on her room. She kicked it to test me, and I took the door off its hinges. One day without the luxury of a door, and she was willing to apologize and agree to not kick things. It didn't stop the drama, but it did stop her from being destructive during the drama.
She grew out of it about six or seven, but she still needs alone time as an adult. I do think that getting her into climbing really helped. Learning to focus the frustration, intense emotion and drama into energy that helped her climb harder gave her a great outlet and helped exhaust her where she could handle things a lot better.
Hang in there. For us, the worst was over by first grade.
