We also used to have discussion about being a good hostess at that age.during play dates I could just ask are you being a good hostess? or do you think your guest is having fun? sometimes that would change the tone.
That strategy never worked for us... DS was too attached to what he wanted to do. We would have to agree before the playdate on what activities were okay to offer a friend on that day. It's OK to make a plan beforehand if your DD needs that.
Once in a while we let him be the leader by showing an interested friend his chemistry set, but usually we only approve activities that both kids like equally.
DeeDee
