Amy, what exactly is an ARD meeting? Is it a meeting where you draft an IEP, or a meeting where you determine eligibility, or something else? My advice is to not agree to or sign anything *at the meeting* if the district is proposing your ds be found eligible as OHI/ED and you're not comfortable with it as a diagnosis. You can disagree and request an outside evaluation, and you can also request that the decision be postponed pending the results of your outside evaluation (which I think you're set up for soon? Sorry if I am not remembering that correctly!). Team meetings can be very intimidating - but remember that you know your son better than anyone else who will be at the meeting! Also try not to get caught up in worries that you have to have something in place asap or that you have to agree to something because you're having the meeting now or because the end of the school year is near. Parenting and advocating for 2e kids with special needs isn't just a quick define-the-problem-and-it's-solved - it's going to be a journey, and you're going to be back in meetings like this again. Don't let the school staff intimidate you into thinking you must agree now!
Also, fwiw, we had ds' school try to categorize ds with an inappropriate diagnosis. The thing that helped us most in advocating for services was to gather all the data we could from the private professionals we've seen that countered the district's perceived diagnosis - and it worked. The diagnosis they suggested was *not* appropriate so that was key, but having data from the outside professionals was persuasive - when the school staff questioned any of it, we simply replied with "Are you questioning the findings of a professional neuropsychologist with xxxx credentials" or "Are you questioning the findings of a highly respected pediatrician" etc - and that shut down objections to the private reports and conclusions quickly.
Good luck tomorrow - you'll get through it, and you'll do a wonderful job of advocating for your ds!
polarbear
