Hi, thanks for responding! I will check out the other site. The TOLD P4 is not an IQ test it's a language test- Test of Language Development. When I told his private therapists about his scores they all said they aren't surprised. Yet this is the same boy that doesn't know how to return a greeting from a peer and had to be taught scripts which is still struggles with. But he can converse with adults and sound formal even for an adult. His K teacher says that if given free time he gravitates to the math and science stuff and art (rather than pretend play or writing etc). He's very smart but he doesn't want to follow the schools agenda so he ends up getting almost no instruction and he had huge behavioral problems there. So bad that they finally had to outplace him and he was already in the autism program.
Our choices were schools for kids with emotional disturbance- the kids there are all very verbal and cognitively most are at least ave. The other choice was an ASD specific school where the kids have social deficits and sensory issues like my son but he will probably be at the top language and cognitive wise for the most part. We chose the ASD school because of my concern (and all of his private therapists) that he would pick up very negative things at the ED schools. (some kids do stuff like fire setting, swearing, sexual comments at age 6 etc)
I'm wishing that there was a school with really small classes that was more self-directed where he would learn. He is interested in a variety of things and smart- but it's all of his own terms and self-directed. I never have a problem getting him to do school work at home because he wants to do it and usually chooses to do it on his own. At school he won't do anything without them giving him candy, having him work for rewards etc. He bolts from the classroom and his, bites, kicks, the whole deal. He also has an anxiety issue with being around groups of kids and about performing in front of others. He is a major perfectionist so if he perceives that he won't be able to do something as well as the rest of the kids he just won't do it. Never mind that his reading and math achievement is above grade level, it's all in how he perceives himself and he perceives himself to be at the bottom. Partially my fault for always trying to work on his weaknesses all these years while neglecting his strength. I think I made him feel like he's not good enough. At home we have switched to an RDI approach to try to help things.
Anyway, thanks again for responding.
Just another thing- my son is an awesome dancer. He loves Michael Jackson and can copy his dances and just has a way of moving his body that makes it look so easy. But he WILL NOT do it in front of people he doesn't know extremely well. He took a music class for awhile (preschool music) and the teacher pulled me aside and said he had musical talent with the beat and drums. But again, he won't do it in music class or in groups. We ended up having to stop the music class because he was obsessed with the drums and microphone and had no interest in following the routine of the class. I just couldn't handle to looks and stares from the other parents anymore when their kids were 2 years younger and socially more appropriate than my son. The parents were all so relaxed while I was working my butt off and I felt judged.
Jennifer
