Hi - Any advice on how to manage kid questions about classroom changes? I don't mean the questions your own kid asks, I mean the questions their peers ask at school. I wonder if any of you have had similar experiences to our situation and can offer help; likewise those of you with sensitive kids who've done grade skips mid-year might be able to offer advice too....
DD10 is having a very tough year so far. She has come out of school crying/sad/mad/complaining too many times to count this year. Very long story short, she has a less than good teacher who is brand new to teaching (AND had a newborn and a 3 yo when school started... so needless to say exhausted and overwhelmed teacher!), whose style is *not* a good fit for DD, and who isn't doing well with challenging DD. DD was finally starting to get the enriched math she needs (along with a few others at her grade level... so not even just for her!), but that - according to DD - the teacher has stopped (could just be because of mid-year assessments, which I hope is the case). Add to that she's having some real mean-girl issues in her class. The principal said 'bullying' when we discussed -- I'm not so sure I'd go *that* far (its become such a loaded term... beyond what I think is going on here... low level bullying, if you will, but it is persistent and pervasive), but its clearly taking a toll.
Between the social and academic issues, we're considering switching classrooms. NOT a grade skip, a lateral move to a different classroom (our school has 3 classrooms at each grade). If it were *just* a poor teacher fit or *just* a kid problem I'd likely try to work on it (you encounter people who are hard to deal with in all walks of life, right?) but I think its just that little bit too much such that she won't be able to actually work on it bc she's spending all her time and energy just barely coping. Make sense?
Here's the issue: classroom changes after school starts are very rare at our school. And as the principal pointed out, kids are going to ask DD why she switched classes. A lot. And they aren't going to take her shoulder shrug as an answer. DD will not handle these questions well without some help... I truly believe she'll have a better remainder of the year once we get past that initial awkward transition time (she does have lovely, caring friends in both of the other classes), but ... I *really* worry about that transition time.
Add to this that it is coming off of an 'incident' in the classroom. DD ended up saying something unkind to the other girl, who promptly told on her. So what we (the principal and I) are also concerned about is that this will look like DD is being moved bc she was bad. Oh, and the principal admitted that in bullying situations they usually move the bully, so there is potential for that to add to DD looking like the bad apple.
I wonder if anyone else here has moved a kid due to bullying or other issues, and how you helped your kiddo cope with questions. If you don't have that experience, but have the experience of a kid who doesn't like to toot his/her own horn, or is shy and emotionally intense, who was grade skipped, how did your DC handle the questions that others had about the class change?
Any advice or experience would be super helpful!
