Originally Posted by Tallulah
Originally Posted by Wren
Originally Posted by Tallulah
Originally Posted by Wren
So unless you schedule things, or plan playdates, it is hard to let them just go out and play. Which means you have to be out and about with them. I think finding that compromise without the activities to fill their time, because my kid will watch Disney reruns, is hard. She cannot just go out and play.
Attitude is a different story but I don't have a kid with an IQ of 121. I have a kid that is fully capable of being on Harvard's screen and has legacy. So where does that leave me in terms of being a Tiger Mom?
Shades of grey or gray?

Why can't she have free play? Your backyard. A playground with you sitting on the bench. Your house without the TV on?

But, Wren, haven't we had this discussion before and you proudly describe yourself as one of these high pressure parents? Your priorities are for structured activity and a lot of academics from a young age, aren't they?

Ouch. We go for 2 hour walks with the dog along the lake and find mink etc. And we are in an apt, no backyard. And playdates are structured activities. They are not, running out the back door like I did and into the woods with friends or alone and finding something to occupy myself.
And DD is an extrovert. TV off, she goes into her room and sometimes plays with Barbies but sometimes the technology goes on. She is not great without friends. Either was I. I was always looking for someone in the neighborhood to play with. And in a neighborhood full of kids, you could find someone. That is hard today. Your kid wanders around alone, a parent will call you, like are you crazy?
And being on the park bench is time consuming. Perhaps you have hours of time to sit on a bench while your child explores the park, how many can do that everyday. Because a kid is like a dog, it needs that play/social interaction everyday, not once a week. So if not structured, what is your solution, you with the political sense and judgement of a --- fill in the blank.

But don't you have to sit on a bench outside the piano lesson or swimming lesson or whatever? No different from sitting at the park. Yes, lots of kids are in school/afterschool until 6, but afterschool doesn't take them around to various lessons. In terms of time, and the specific reasons you gave for why your child can't have play time, if you're taking her somewhere, why not the park?

I disagree that a playdate is structured. Yes, it's scheduled, but once the other child arrives, don't they just play?

I'm not trying to attack you or anything, but you said unstructured play was important to you, and I'd like to help troubleshoot to figure out how you can make it happen.

No, I was quoting Madeline Levine, which I wrote a few posts ago. She says it should be scheduled playdates.

My kid has had playdates, at other people's houses the last couple days, which did give me time off. And she had a great time, but as Madeline Levine talked about, it doesn't do all the stuff that going out into the hood, finding mates and then creating activities out of nothing.

And I do not think you could provide me with solutions. So thank you, no.