This forum has been so helpful for understanding my DS8 better. I am concerned about something he has mentioned a few times to me recently. Today when I was throwing his shoes in the trash, he told me he felt really sad for it and couldn't bear seeing it in the garbage. Other few times he as mentioned he feels very sad when dropping objects because he feels he has hurt them.
He knows it's irrational but claims he can't help these thoughts. It seems so bizarre to me; should i be really worried? Thank you!

It sounds like an emotional or imaginative OE, and not an uncommon one. Objects can be an extension of the self. I remember feeling the same. As long as it's not too upsetting for him or hindering him (like turning him into a mini-hoarder) I'd say don't worry. He's just endowing the objects with his memories and is clearly empathetic.

There may be a strong positive in that he may be excellent at "perspective taking" and Theory of Mind (ToM). I'd probably compliment him on this likely extension of his skill in this area.

Anthropomorphism or personification may also help fuel creativity in artwork and writing, for example a book from the viewpoint of the shoes, highlighting favorite wonderful adventures. I'd probably suggest this as well.

I'm not in a position to render a professional opinion, but personally would not worry unless the inanimate objects began to have aggressive, intimidating, or otherwise unsettling qualities... if his thoughts seemed to linger... or if his empathy was only toward inanimate objects, not humans, pets, other creatures.

DD8 is attached to practically everything that crosses her path. If you're going to throw away anything in her room, it has to be done when she's not looking. She doesn't want to donate anything to the thrift store -- we have to take pictures and say goodbye to those things, even if they are just shirts that she never even wore.

She's been known to get emotionally attached to a piece of string or a twig or a rock that she found; she names it, and it has to go everywhere with her, until the next big thing comes along and displaces it. (She's pretty fickle, but heavily attached in a serial way.)

I don't find it particularly unusual, because I remember being the same way as a child (and, to some degree, still).

I'd say the other posters are just right. I did this as a child -- I hid my animal-shaped vitamins instead of taking them, because I didn't want to eat them. :-)

I tend to think it's empathy. My dc was at a group the other day when someone brought in a kitten. The other kids were all over it, very excited, and dc held back. The teacher commented, "NAME wasn't very interested in the kitten." I asked dc, and it turns out dc held back out of empathy -- dc felt the the poor kitten probably was overwhelmed and, as much as dc wanted to pet it, dc didn't want to add to its stress!

Our ODS has this toward his stuffed animal friends (who number around 20 at last count). They all have feelings and I have been told to watch what I say around them, so as not to make any of them feel badly, etc.

Yes. Similarly with imaginary friends. As long as they aren't controlling, don't say anything nasty or negative to the child, or suggest that they do anything dangerous or destructive, I wouldn't worry about it. Just like with real friends, actually.

I always felt guilty eating gingerbread men.

Cuddly/plush toys are definitely alive in this house.

Yes, this is definitely an empathy/creativity thing.

I should note that YDS, who also has quite an animal collection and who is also quite bright, chides me that his animals Are Not Real whenever I slip and pretend they are alive.

To each their own. ;-)

Yeah. I have a small person who does that, too...accompanied by a slightly pitying look...

I know that look...

Around 2, DS7 had developed his own theory about this: animate objects are those with eyes. I'd say something like "hurry up, your sleep sack is waiting for you!" And he'd exclaim "a sleep sack can't be waiting, a sleep sack doesn't have eyes. A sleep sack is just lying around!"
He was really upset by stuff like Cars and Thomas the tank engine because of the inappropriate eyes...

I get the look with, "Mama, you know [insert object] is non-living."

That's funny, because as much as DD is into the lives of her various inanimate objects, there are also certain things that she is extremely literal about and just doesn't understand my jokes. I can't think of one at the moment, of course, but she gives me that look/lecture sometimes.

My daughter has been having a great deal of trouble with this recently. We were at a museum where they showed trash that had been left in the park and one of the trash items was a stuffed cat. She was really upset thinking about both the child who had lost it and the cat needing to be cleaned up and cared for. If we could have brought it home for her to clean, she would have done so.

On the one hand, I'm extremely glad that she is sensitive and empathetic. On the other hand, it has become so bad lately that it has become very hard to take. I don't want to discourage her from being empathetic, but am becoming exhausted. Right now, she is upset because her pet spiders despawned in Minecraft. She is making a memorial.

This thread is so helpful! When my child did things along these lines, sometimes I was proud of her for her empathy and sometimes thought she was a little off her rocker. She has to buy the neglected, unloved toy so that it gets a good home. For two years, she brought dead leaves into my house so that they wouldn't decay during the winter. She recently had a dustup with a teacher over the feelings she attributed to a piece of paper. I am relieved to read some of the comments here.

Today DD3 said "I'm pretending my balloon is dead."

This thread is useful because I've been bothered lately by DS10 not wanting to throw certain things out. We all have pack-rattish tendencies so I just filed under "annoying". But actually this thread's title gives a much better explanation for recent incidents, e.g., want to keep the completely worn out instrument case we've just replaced. (Obviously instruments are alive; I just didn't quite make the leap to their tatty plastic cases being so too!)

That would have upset ME even. Still remember losing my favourite stuffed dog on a trip - 7 years old, fur loved off, I'm sure it ended up thrown in the trash by an uncaring person.
Give your daughter an extra hug from me, will you?

I remember as a kid we got a new pram to replace the really old one that was used for my the first 3 of us. My brother asked if he could have the old one to make a go cart out of and was told he could. To me it seemed like an act of betrayal. I still feel that way about things sometimes. I don't think they are alive I just feel some sort of loyalty to something that has served me well. I have pack rack tendencies but am trying not to become a hoarder. Ds7 cries if I throw his torn clothes out but is OK with donating outgrown stuff.

DD9 attaches memories and their associated emotions to nearly everything in her possession, which makes getting rid of anything problematic. Just recently, DD got a room overhaul, and as I was assembling a bookshelf, I got to overhear DD arguing with DW over every scrap of clothing in the closet.

She can also tell you the name of every one of her stuffed animals, and the circumstances under which she got them. Several have had to be consigned to the Harry Potter suite (a sort of clubhouse/reading nook under her ridiculously oversized bed/dresser/desk combo), but those that remain take up so much space on her bed that she can barely find room to sleep. Don't even think about getting rid of any of those.

Yeah - I was like this as a kid and outgrew it. Have a sib who did not who could probably be in an episode of "High IQ Hoarders" if they ever have a show like that on A&E.