New member here, although have been reading posts in this forum for the last couple months as a guest. What a great resource of information!

Brief background: We knew early on that our DS (4.5), was doing things that other kids his age were not. Currently, he reads at 3-4th grade level and doing 4th-5th grade math. We did private testing over the summer to push for at least early entry Kindergarten. He had been at a Montessori school for the last couple years and was doing ok. The staff was accommodating, but although they have good intentions, do not have experience dealing with gifted kids. The kids were mostly �young� to him, & he did not have like-minded peers to interact with. I had planned on keeping DS at this school for K as I felt that at least they could differentiate his learning, it was self-paced, flexible with his sensory processing needs (allowing him to work outside, on the floor, etc), and accepting of his emotional intensity. The staff agreed to let him be in the K program (essentially hesitant, but eventually agreed it would be best so that he could move to 1st the following year) because of his abilities. But he started to exhibit some behavior the last few months that started to suggest that it was perhaps not the best and that he was outgrowing the environment. We made the decision at the last moment to put DS in another school.

The other school is a private school that caters to the gifted, with staff that are familiar with working with gifted kids. They also agreed to let him in early K. It is an extremely small school (less than 50 for K-8), but located in a somewhat remote business complex. Although it does not look or feel like a traditional school, I was willing to overlook it if it would be a better fit for my son. I�ve only heard good things about it, and the families there are very happy with the education they are receiving for the kids. Today was DS�s 3rd day, and things are going well so far (no phone calls from the office!). He rushes in every morning, excited about school.

Here lies the problem, though: a friend of mine who was visiting the school pointed out to me that just around the corner (but still adjacent to the office space that the school is located at) is a gun shop. I had not noticed it as it has a pretty unassuming name that would not suggest guns being sold, and my mindset just figured that there would not be a business like that next to a school. Looking into it (on the store�s website), you can pretty much get any kind of firearm there. Now, I know that it is unlikely that anything would ever happen, but just knowing that it is there makes me uncomfortable and nervous. From the entrance of the school, you cannot see the gun store.

So, as a parent, if you were in my shoes, what would you do? Would you keep your child in that school that actually gets your child & may be the best option for them, despite the setting? DH and I are both working professionals and I am still in grad school, so homeschooling is a last resort at this point. His Montessori teacher (who has also worked in the public school system) says the public schools may not be able to accommodate him, and I don�t think DS would do well there anyway as he is a little bit out of the box. Local private schools may not be enough for him either. Plus he wouldn�t meet the cut-offs for K in our state and it may be a long advocacy battle for him. We could go back to the Montessori school, but not sure that�s a good fit anymore. Just wanted to unload my thoughts/worries � any input would be appreciated, thanks!

Honestly, I would put in a call to the local police and ask them about the shop. Let them know your situation and they will be able to tell you if that shop is a problem.
I'm willing to bet that it isn't a problem since the other families are happy.

?

Speaking as someone who believes very strongly in gun control and even more strongly in taxing the living daylights out of bullets at the point of sale:

Why would you call the police about a business that has a legal right to operate? What would you expect them to do?

To the OP: I think this is a personal decision you have to make. Think about your concerns and discuss them with your husband. What's his opinion? Then do some research about your concerns if necessary (e.g. if you're worried about someone buying a gun and going on a shooting spree, find out how many gun crimes are committed immediately after the criminal buys a gun).

I think maybe to find out if there has been any criminal activity linked to guns purchased at this store, to get an idea of the clientele who frequent it and who would therefor be close to the school.

(shudder) Sleepless I'm so sorry you're stuck with this decision. I can't even (rationally) weigh in on it... I have the good ol' Canadian born and bred revulsion/aversion towards guns. I've worked with them too - I've been trained and licensed to carry (for work only). Guns are hideous.

Anyway... I don't know what I would do in your shoes. Ruin the best (yet) educational opportunity for my child over fears of something that may never happen? (This is me trying to be rational ) Or take a stand against something I don't believe in?

I wish you the best of luck - I hope you figure out something that works.

If your community has a zoning law that requires stores to not sell alcohol, explicit material, guns, etc, within a specified distance of a school, your city council representative or your zoning department would know that. If they are in violation, then you can request that your councilman address the issue through proper channels. But most of the time when a charter or independent school is located in an empty business building, businesses that were previously there are grandfathered in and not required to relocate just because the school moved there.

A gun shop in and of itself wouldn't worry me nearly as much as a bar, a liquor store, or an adult video shop. Most of your seedier types are not going to go the legal route for a gun, so you'll likely find a lot of people who are trained and respect firearms.

But you have to live with your comfort level, and that is different for each individual,

Good point. I think this is very likely true.

So hard to decide... you might ask at the school about it. See if they have any future plans to move to another location (possible that they do). If so, you might be able to deal with it for a year or two. I am sure they will reassure you that it is not/will not be a problem (they have an interest in promoting this viewpoint, of course).

I will also say that at least in our state, guns are now EVERYWHERE. Concealed carry is a fact in most states now, and honestly your risk probably isn't any higher around the corner from a gun shop than at the grocery store or other public location or driving down the street (have been a couple of road rage with guns incidents in our community just in the past few months). That, of course, is a whole 'nuther topic. But in weighing the relative risk, it is something to consider.

Me, the mom of a 12 year old (and 10 and 8 year old) wouldn't think twice about it - I absolutely believe that the risk of something happening associated with the gun shot *at all* is very low, and much lower that it would happen to somehow actually happen to my child. I don't know about where you live, but in our area it's legal to carry concealed weapons if you have a license - that seems like a much higher risky thing to worry about. When my cousin was in high school she was accidentally shot in a foot by a friend - not something you'd ever expect to have happened, especially in the situation she was in at the time - *those* things I think, while almost 100% *not* to happen are still probably more likely to happen than something associated with the gun store.

As the mom of a 12 year old 2e child, whom it took us literally almost all of elementary school to find a good school fit for - no way would I have time to even think about the shop, and no way would I pull my ds out of the school once I'd found a great school.

And now that I've been so nonchalant about the gun shop, I also have to let you know how I would have answered this question when my oldest was in preschool - I would have freaked out with worry. I almost didn't send him to a really great preschool because the teachers took the kids to the nearby park every afternoon. I *loved* that they went on walks to parks - in theory. But then I saw a teacher leading a group of 3 & 4 year olds down the street in pairs and all I could think of - when my ds does that, he's going to step out off the sidewalk into the street at the exact minute a car flings by. Fortunately I was talked down on that matter by my girlfriends, I sent him to the school (still worrying) and he never once came anywhere near the path of a car (as far as I know!). He also loved his preschool and so did I.

Later on as my ds grew I found other things to freak out with worry over too - I think that's all a part of watching our kids grow and slowly letting go. Just this last summer ds took a sailing course. DS knows how to swim, but he'd never been sailing before. They were going to sail (deep long breath here.....) on... a lake. OH YIKES was I nervous about that. But dh talked me down and we sent him off and he had a blast. He's had so many opportunities over the years that... I've totally worried my socks off of and I'm sure that 90% of the gray hairs on my head are due to those worries. The good news is, it has always so far worked out ok (knocking on wood here! lol!).

Practically speaking, in your situation, I'd probably just ask around among the other parents to see if anyone else has worried about it, and if so, have they heard anything that's really of concern. I'd even probably ask the folks at the front desk at the school or the playground supervisors or even the principal. I think you'll most likely hear a lot of reassurance.

Congrats on finding a good school!

polarbear

ps - not meant to scare or anything, but do you ask friends' parents if they have guns in the house before you let your child go there for a playmate? I don't, but I'm mentioning that because the times I've heard or children being hurt by guns, other than when they are caught in random cross-fire between rival gangs... have all been when kids were playing at someone's house and a gun is either played with or accidentally fired. That's what happened to my cousin.

Thanks everyone for the input. Indeed, this is ultimately a personal decision for our family so I am trying to weigh in on the matter in the most rational way that I can, because I know from a subjective point of view as a parent, it's hard not to feel some sort of emotion with the situation.

From what I understand, the store does have a legal right to be there as they and the school are private businesses. I spoke with the school regarding my concerns, and they did try to reassure me, and even suggested that I even visit the store to get a sense for what it is like (although personally, I will probably not as I am so averse to guns myself). Unfortunately, the school cannot do anything about the store being there.

The school claims that the people who own the store are respectful, friendly people who are indeed very professional, and their clientele as well. Supposedly they are like a specialty gun shop and sell many collector type of firearms. It is not a shady looking store, not in a shady area, and discreet looking. The sheriff/police are aware of the situation, and do drive by there occasionally to let their presence known. The school says that when the store moved in about a year and a half ago, many people were up in arms about it as well, and probably had to go through much of what I'm feeling now, but the fact that it is not much of an issue for them alleviates my worries (somewhat).

DH an I have been discussing it a lot. Yes, the likelihood that anything happening there is extremely low. Incidents/accidents involving guns probably don't happen right outside gun shops. But as a mom, it's hard to overlook something like that as you always worry about the safety of your children. We have yet to make any final decision. Although I was ready to pull my son out of the school the morning after I found out about the shop, after a couple days of letting it stew and talking to more people about it, I have a least decided to give it some more thought.

Thanks,
Sleepless

I'm sorry, I don't exactly understand? What is it you are afraid of? The guns coming to life and flying out the shop and into the school? Groups of sociopaths buying guns and deciding to shoot the first thing they see?

A gun shop is probably just about the safest business you could possibly operate. No one in their right mind is going to attempt to rob it. Criminals can't buy anything in them, so why would they be there? The only people who go into gun stores are law abiding citizens, and the overwhelming majority of them are perfectly sane and will never even fire their gun outside of a gun range.

I hate guns, but I wouldn't worry about this. I don't know. I live in an area of the country where guns are common. DS's school is near a pawn shop. I'm sure it sells guns. I've never given it a thought.

(My personal bugaboos involve my kids and cars or water.)

The risk that a psychopath would purchase a gun and take it next door to shoot up a school, just because it happened to be in close proximity, is insignificant. In fact, I can't find a news article on such an event happening, ever. Schools do sometimes become targets for criminals, but not so much random targets. I understand fear of guns, but since they're nearly omnipresent in American society, I think avoiding a school on the basis of a nearby legit gun store would be irrational.

What you should be concerned with, if you're worried about guns, is whether a school has a good emergency plan in place, whether your child knows what to do in an emergency, and whether he knows what to do if he's around a gun.

I often joked that I would consider myself a failure as a father if my children could not field-strip their weapons *blind-folded* by the age of six.

Thankfully, my better judgement prevailed... and I removed the blind-fold requirement. (Don't want to scare the townfolk, you know.)

Seriously, though, and without taking the bait, I think you should spend some time reading about background of violence in schools, and be sure to include the Secret Service's "Safe School's Initiative" 2002 report, as it makes for some interesting reading:
http://www.secretservice.gov/ntac/ssi_final_report.pdf

Bottom line: I would be more concerned about the school's handling of bullying than what's on sale at the local Big 5.

I agree.

The police would know if they often have trouble with that particular shop. That's all.

I would ask them if they have trouble with that shop or its customers. They would know best if it were a dangerous spot.

LOL.

What would I do?

Drop in and check out what they had for sale!

More than likely the shop is owned by an ex-cop and many of the local LEOs buy stuff there.

And everyone who buys guns there is either a CHL holder with an extensive background check or has gone through a FBI background check. A very dangerous place to be sure.

I trained troops in the Army and trained a lot of people in civilian life. All the people in my classes or the classes I've been to have been great people - doctors, dentists, nurses, lawyers, pastors, priests, moms, teachers, dads, cops, judges, elected officials, military, you name it. These are the kind of people who go to that shop. Awful people for sure.

Personally, I think you are operating from a lack of knowledge about guns, the gun industry, and the people that own guns. Worrying about a gun shop is like worrying about a pharmacy because they sell drugs or a car dealership because they sell getaway cars.

My recommendation would be to take a class or two in firearm safety and firearms use from a good instructor. No doubt that store could help you out. Then you would be more informed than you are now.

I came across these articles concerning gun laws about the location of gun stores and gun ranges being allowed/not being allowed close to schools, residential areas etc. Both articles and the comments after the second article contain both points of view. You are definitely not the only one concerned about guns being close to a school.

"In suburbs, gun range and shop expansions near Chicago trigger debate
City's regulations push enthusiasts out of town, spark safety concerns"
July 16, 2012|By Jonathan Bullington, Chicago Tribune reporter

http://articles.chicagotribune.com/...ange-shooting-range-gun-rights-advocates

Towards the end of this article it discuss a law that bands not only gun ranges but gun stores from a half mile of schools, parks, etc



"Lincolnwood 'Quietly' OKs Firing Range, Gun Shop"

http://skokie.patch.com/articles/li...range-gun-shop-near-schools#pdf-10350880

Some interesting comments arguing both sides of the argument of gun store ranges being close to schools etc.


I'm not sure what I think

The best arguments are the facts.

The article is from Chicago where most guns are banned. There are virtually no gun shops in Chicago proper yet it has the highest rate of gun crime in the nation. There are dozens of murders every week in the summer.

I'd look for articles in states that actually have lots of guns and are gun friendly. Like Texas or Arizona. You won't find any articles because it is a non-issue in those states.

You won't find any articles like these...

http://www.cnn.com/2010/CRIME/09/28/texas.university.shooting/?hpt=T2

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Whitman

http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/03/02/us-usa-shooting-arizona-idUSTRE82108E20120302

http://www.azcentral.com/community/...g-phoenix-middle-school-no-injuries.html

Please note - I'm one of the folks who posted already that I wouldn't worry about the location of the gun shop - but fwiw, criminals and/or people who have dangerous plans do in fact sometimes buy guns at gun shops. Sometimes they purchase the gun under false pretenses (false id), sometimes the gun shop owners are less than thorough in requesting id/following up with background checks etc. It's certainly not the usual norm and it's certainly not most gun shops, but it does happen.

polarbear

It's also worth noting that while a lot of soldiers are awesome people, a lot of them were bullies to begin with, and too many of them are coming home with PTSD and other psychological problems. The same can be said for law enforcement officers. Yet these people often have guns, extensive gun training, and can pass a background check with flying colors. The recent spate of shootings on military bases says it all.

But then, the historical record tells us that the people who pose the greatest threat to kids in schools are other kids themselves. The children of responsible gun owners have access to guns in the home, and they typically know how to use them.

You can count me in the "don't worry about it" camp as well, but if you use terrible arguments to support the position, you're going to make people worry once they notice how terrible the arguments are.

An example of a good argument would be that the gun store operators and patrons themselves are heavily armed, trained, and often experienced, so an active shooter would be confronted by an armed response quicker than you could dial 9-1-1.

Another example of a good argument would be that a school shooter is highly unlikely to obtain the weapon at a store next door, so the existence of the store next door does not add any level of threat. Most school shootings are done by current or former students, and the firearms usually are obtained from the home or the home of another gun owner. Whether that gun owner obtains that firearm from a gun store next door, or 50 miles away, makes no difference.

Ok, trying this again (for some reason my previous reply hasn't posted)...

Thanks everyone for the input. Indeed, this is ultimately a personal decision for our family so I am trying to weigh in on the matter in the most rational way that I can.

From what I understand, the store does have a legal right to be there as they and the school are private businesses. I spoke with the school regarding my concerns, and they did try to reassure me, and suggested that I visit the store to get a sense for what it is like. Unfortunately, the school cannot do anything about the store being there. The school claims that the people who own the store are respectful, friendly people who are indeed very professional, as are their clientele. They are like a specialty gun shop and sell many collector type of firearms (although it seems as if you can get pretty much anything). It is not a shady looking store, not in a shady area, and discreet looking. The sheriff/police are aware of the situation. The school says that when the store moved in about a year and a half ago, many people were upset about it as well, and probably had to go through much of what I'm feeling as a parent, but the fact that it is not much of an issue for them alleviates my worries (somewhat).

DH and I have been discussing it a lot. Yes, the likelihood that anything happening there is extremely low. Incidents/accidents involving guns don't happen right outside gun shops. But as a mom, especially with young kids, it's hard to overlook ANYTHING that may jeopardize the safety of your children. We have yet to make a final decision, but are leaning on keeping him there for now � as many of you know, finding a school which can accommodate your child and keep you and the child happy is so hard to come by these days, so that value of that cannot be overlooked either.

Thanks,
Sleepless