My DSY,DS9 said he doesn't want to change schools despite his fustration. I will keep working on his cause if he stays where he is but they are just not going to give him what he needs and it's has hurt him. Would you make your child change schools if you thought it was the best thing? any advise would be appreciated.

If I felt certain that the new school would meet his needs then probably. I wouldn't want to make a move without a good plan in place though.

i would do everything i could to get DS to see my side.

I think that in the end, the parents have to be the ones to make the final call. Yes - I do give my DS13 more imput in his educational options then any 13 year old in our how town, but I think it is 'leaving him out to dry' to let him have the final say.

My mom used to tell a great story about her own childhood:

Every year, my Grandmother would ask her, "Do you want to go to summer camp?"
My mom would say "no" and she wouldn't go.

After many years, my mom said "Yes" and had a wonderful time. She came home very upset, and said:
"Mom, Summer Camp is great! WHY didn't you MAKE me go?"
"Well you said that you didn't want to go."
"Mom, how could you listen to ME. I'M JUST A KID!!!!"

If that isn't outward perfectionism at work, I don't know what is!

When my DS13 gets bossy and critical of the job I'm doing raising him, it helps me to see that in our family, this is a multi-generational thing. There are thinks that we truly can't know. I would make the final call EVEN if I wasn't sure the alternative was right - just based on knowing that the status quo is definitely wrong. I'm just looking for the 'least worst' option.

Love and More Love,
Grinity

I think that you are the parents and you know what is best for your child. No one likes change. I had friends who had to switch their child last year and she was not happy about it, but you know what?! It all worked out. She loves her new school and is very happy. perhaps taking some trips there and showing him all of the cool things he will experience there (they most likely have a website.... check it out and see the current happenings.) are there any summer camp opportunities at the new school? the more familiar it is, the easier the transition may be.

Iff it really doesn't work out, you can always return to the old school but just not giving it a try, you will never know! He may like it 100X more!!!!

It is a very difficult situation that we found ourselves in a few times. We've changed schools various times always looking for the "right spot". Unfortunately, we've been advised we won't find it in a school here in our town. That our options are to move to another city, or to Homeschool. We are always concerned about moving him from one school to another as well as from Homeschooling to traditional, but our son is very social and blends in on the first day. We too give him many opportunities to give us input, but in the end as his parents we needed to make the final decisions. Good luck, and know you are not alone, many of us have had to make the school moves.

switching schools will take at least of year to get your ds accommodated. ( i could be wrong here, but that is what we tell ourselves when i dream of switching schools.)

right now, i'm not willing to waste another year.

i was hoping things were getting better for you,
chrys

I would take my DD on a our of the new school, sit in a few classes, meet the staff, eat lunch.
I would make a pro-con list with her and make the desicion together.
My DD is very sensitive so, if I could not get her to agree I would not make the change.
I think a 9yo should atleast have vote, even if the final decision is yours.

Thanks for all the encouragement. I agree parents need to have the final say. I just wanted to hear what you all had to say. The weight on my shoulder is hard to handle. I need to have another talk with DH.

Everyone seem to think 4th grade is lots more busy work at current school. I think that will really push him over the edge. He says he doesn't even want to do enrichment next year because it's just more work. (This means not good work) He was an ambitious kid. so sad