Like you and Inky, I've had similar experiences. I can divide them into phases:
First phase (Cluelessness): Before we had kids, my husband and I resolved that our kids would not do academics before they were six. Early childhood was for playing with clay and drawing and running around outside!! We could not believe that some people would teach their kids how to read when they were four or five!
Second phase (Naivete): This phase began on the day our three-year old son toddled up to my husband and asked him to teach him "how to wead." We started lessons and it turned out he already knew most of the letter sounds and what vowels were. I think it is safe to say that we forgot about our resolution
very quickly.
Sometime in the midst of this stage, it came time to go to school. We found a wonderful little school for him, where every child was valued and worked to his/her greatest potential (tm)! School was going to be great!
Third phase (Realityness): This phase began the day before DS's first day at that wonderful school where he would be valued to his greatest potential. I told his teacher he could read, and she looked at me like I was speaking Martian to her. Things went downhill from there.
Most (
most) of the teachers at my son's first school didn't call us pushy. However, one hinted that he should be medicated because he wouldn't sit still. (As a side topic, it's fascinating when teachers blame the kid because they aren't challenging him.)
Chin up Talullah; it's no fun, but at least you aren't alone!
Val