Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Pre-school What method in a preschool?

I liked Montessori for my daughter (now 9). She went to a school that was preschool through 8th grade, and kids were allowed to progress at their own pace. She's since been diagnosed ADHD, and looking back I can see how montessori gave her some much needed structure and organizational skills.

However, my current experience with my son (4) is, well, meh. The school he's at only goes up through pre-k and it's not a true montessori, though they use many of the same methods and materials. They just don't have the resources or advanced materials to deal with a kid who's more than a year or so ahead.

So I guess my advice would be to ask how far ahead a school would allow your son to go, and if they have the experience and resources to support him.

Here goes: IMO what you need to look for, that you amy not think of, or not have mentioned in the typical info on the subject.

1. WINDOWS - so many pre-schools seem to be in windowless basements!

2. Clean bathrooms - yes, make an excuse to visit it.

3, Teacher's that show a sense of humor either to you or through their classrooms.
Everyone, including kids, learn and remember things that give them belly
laughs.

4. Freedom of movement and accessibility of resources.

5. Books. Books. Books. Plenty of which look well worn.


Think I'm having to much fun with this, and have 'stuff' I should be doing. Good Luck in your search.

Oh, and visit, visit, visit.

We are in the same boat as you with Mr W (27mos). He can count to 100 and can read about 50 different words in both Spanish and English. He has a photographic memory for faces and names and music.

About 6 months ago we did a lot of searching and realized that no school is going to do it all and that he was getting much of the academic side at home. So, we changed our criteria to find a place where he would be with older kids, that was flexible, and whose program was as different as possible from home. We found a wonderful Montessori program for him. They noticed his abilities the first week and have worked individually with him since.

So far, so good. He loves it and they let him read and do his own thing while the other kids learn their ABCs and numbers. (They have to distract him otherwise he blurts out the answers..)

He is loved by all the kids and staff - mainly because he is so social and remembers names and faces. He does weird out some parents, but his smile and flirty nature wins them back.

Given the reading we have done on here, this may be OK for a few months or another year or two. We just have to play it by ear.

Our next step may be to add in a tutor in the mornings before going to Montessori school. We also researched local schools and just recently moved into a local school district that has a special program where they put PG kids together starting in Kindergarten. He'll be eligible for early entrance in two years. But we'll just have to see.

I think the way to start is by really thinking about what you want your son to experience now. Is it really important that he learn to sit still and listen at 3 (or at 4)? Is it important that he is given schoolwork that is challenging? Is it important that he have time to run & play with other kids? Is it important that his teachers accept him for who he is? Is it important that he not be exposed to superfluous education (e.g., relearning the ABCs)?

I'd start by figuring out what is non-negotiable to you, and then what you'd prefer and go from there. You might find that it's not the philosophy that matters as much as the way an individual school or teacher applies it. And you might find that a play-based preschool is what your kiddo needs for now.

Hi,

I asked the same questions about my three year old last September and decided to put her in a highly structured play based program. I can share my experience and you can take from it what you will. I am still debating whether that was the right decision and what to do about the upcoming preschool year. Like your son, she was very advanced, but my DD needed to work on various social skills and so I went with a school that didn't touch any of her academic potential. At the end of the year both the teacher and director raised "concerns" about how far ahead she is and so now I am back to the drawing board.

Things that were frustrating for her were that they sing the same songs again and again trying to get them to memorize them and she learns things like that one one or two tries. She also gets annoyed and insulted by being asked to name simple shapes colors etc. but they don't do too much of that. On the other hand, she gets to do crafts which she loves, sing and dance which she loves, be around other children, practice using scissors, and playing on a playground with other children. Like your son, she has been reading forever, can do simple math, write words, and has an incredible memory etc. so is it right to have her at this school next year? I wish I had a crystal ball. I visited their kindergarten at the end of the year and everything they did was too easy for where she is now so I don't have any great advice. For now we are working on her social maturty, self control, and emotional self and gross motor skills since those need a lot more attention than her over active brain! Please let me know what you decide.

Not to be too cynical, but you probably ought to ask if they have any written policy one way or the other on age:grade restrictions. Good luck!

My dd, now 4, had a terrible time in 3yo preschool last year (in Australia). It was a very structured program and the teacher would not accept dd for who she was. She told me dd was making it up when she displayed quite severe depression symptoms that were very obviously related to attending the centre. We took her out and she's in a different, play based centre this year.

They may sound like basic things, but I really agree with Lulu. The environment is so important. While dd doesn't love preschool (she craves a real peer, but her age equivalent scores on the SB5 put her nearly three years ahead of the oldest kids in her class - who are a year older than her) - the new centre's environment is very welcoming and accepting and the teacher is doing her best to try and understand and accommodate dd. As a result, dd would rather be at home, but is ok about going and knows that the teachers respect and care about her.

I think my dd would love Montessori, but I suspect the social issues would still remain - but I guess that relates to circumstance more than a preschool's approach! Though I understand, at least in Australia, that problems can arise with schools being very set on the order in which they allow kids to start new activities. I know if two gifted families who have pulled out of Waldorf. They have just found it too restrictive for a child who just wants to learn (one friend was reprimanded for allowing their son to play chess as he was deemed too young -regardless of the fact that he loved it and was desperate to learn).

I do know some families who have had great success with VERY academic preschools, that extend the kids as necessary - but unless they provide that extension I think structured programs often just re-cover stuff these kids have known for ever anyway. So for me personally the choice would be between a flexible Montessori, a play based program or a very good academic preschool. In each of them, I think the teacher is the most important part (humour, acceptance and respect for the kids are the qualities I now look for).

Sorry, lots of personal opinion rather than fact!

I am a preschool teacher and also a parent to 4 gifted children. My advice is that the teacher and the classroom setup can be some of the biggest considerations. Regardless of what method is taught, if it isn't a good teacher teaching it, you will not have a good experience. I do think it is really important to remember that social skills are huge for gifted children, and many times as children grow older this becomes an issue.

A classroom that is too structured may inhibit his potential but he needs enough structure to learn sitting, listening, peer interaction skills, and following directions. Also, often preschoolers will be years ahead in knowledge, but developmentally they are doing age appropriate fine motor skills. Writing and cutting are both extremely important later on and these are skills that often develop later.

I have two gifted children in my classroom this year and one is a slow methodical thinker who likes to take her time and doesn't have a lot of self-confidence. For her, my loosely structured classroom that gives children lots of choice has been hard for her. She wants me to tell her what to do, and I want her to decide for herself. The other child is superquick and detail oriented who rushes through everything and needs to have lots of movement and activity. No two kids are the same and you need to look at your unique child's personality.

I love the Reggio Emilia method and the freedom to explore that it allows the kids, but this method even more than most requires an amazing teacher!

Anyway, I'd look at how art, literature, science, and cooperative play are taught. If these subjects are dynamic, and fun, then children of all abilities will be able to progress, learn, enjoy the process.

Most of all choose a great center and a great teacher which will enable your child to love learning!

Good luck!!

I agree - teachers/atmosphere are important too! We couldn't afford Montessori (which would've been ideal for DS), and after a few tries, we found the perfect preschool. DS6 had a GREAT pre-k teacher (at age 3-4) and two great state funded pre-K teachers (at age 4-5; late birthday). He didn't learn that many new things, but he was given outside challenges away from the normal curriculum. And he thrived socially, which was good for my shy guy. For us, we couldn't push until he got into the public school. Luckily for us, we didn't have to push when he did get there.

Good luck!