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    Joined: Jul 2009
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    Today DS9 lost it when he was reminded he could not play certain computer games for a long time. He was on the floor yelling and than threw pillows in the house. He say he's bored and I don't want him to have fun.

    When DS loses it it has such a big impact on me. I feel so stressed that I just want to watch tv or go to bed. It physically effects me.

    I could have a plan for the evening that I want to do a project and then I just can't do anything. A walk helps but I can't always get a way by myself because I have to watch the kids. I wish I could be one of those people that get mad and clean all the closets. Any suggestions for this not overwhelming me so much physically?

    I am doing many things to help this intense kid and he keeps improving but how do I deal? I feel much of his anger is displaced about school not on his level. I try to keep in mind it's not really all about me not measuring up as a Mom.

    This venting helps a little. thanks.

    Last edited by onthegomom; 04/19/10 05:00 PM.
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    Hugs to you. Venting helps - we're all in similar shoes with regards to intense kids and maybe our own intense personalities too. So please, load it on.

    We're really unhappy about school as well - the result of going into an unsatisfactory school situation and spending 6 hours there on a daily basis will get any kid riled up. As parents, we have to manage the mess at home.

    Last night after my fight with DS, I read a book till 1am and surfed on this forum. What has helped is looking for strategies to help me deal with my son.

    Good luck! We're all with you here!

    Joined: Nov 2009
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    Well, I'll tell ya...at our house there is a definite pattern. Our DS can only handle good behavior in one place at a time. If she's behaving a.k.a. doing lock-step what everyone else is doing, then she's an absolute emotional basket case at home. Visa-versa, when she's an angel at home, she's disrupting the entire classroom with her antics!

    The best thing that works for us is enriching her free time some with brain-fulfilling activities. We've found a great workbook that we do together as a game called Critical Thinking Skills. It's a lot of fun. But mostly, that little brain needs massaging to quell the bored little monster that gets loose when she's not being taught to her potential! Ugh!

    Then of course, sometimes I just have to hold her and we read, and read, and read. That has always worked!

    It physically effects us all. This forum really helps. I don't feel so alone in these treacherous parenting waters!

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    Oh, and a hot cup of tea and book by myself doesn't hurt either. And then...there is the garden.

    Good luck. I hope you'll return the favor and let me rant myself some night soon, cause I know I'll need it soon.

    Have a good rest of your night!

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    OnTheGo,

    Like the others who have already posted know that you are not alone! Some days I feel so overwhelmed and ineffectual that I just want to cry. I try to remind myself that all that energy, determination and unwillingness to suffer quietly are all traits that can be great strengths when tempered.
    I can also say as a parent with older (19 and 21) children that many of the things I worried about when they were younger never became an issue and I would be hard pressed to even remember most of them!
    I realize this does not help in the moment because even though I know that I still get so caught up in the little ones issues and dramas - so sure I am doing a horrible job parenting.
    Most important is to get perspective and reflect on progress. For example, once my kids would be so intense that a disagreement with each other went right to a physical battle. There were times I thought they might do real damage to each other. Now we hardly ever even get to name calling...lots of raised voices and accusation but still a discussion with little or no personal attacks. Now three years ago I never would have thought it would happen.
    Hang in there and know that this too shall pass...cliche..but true.
    (((Hugs)))


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