Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments my son is being evaluated for special ed...

I agree with aline...we went through this exact same thing with DS7 at the beginning of this school year. I felt railroaded even with an advocate and a full slew of test results. The teacher and guidance counselor chose to focus on his behavior (which was stemmed from him being bored out of his mine and not knowing the correct way to handle his frustration as a 6 year old at the time). They kept telling me that they wanted to asses for Aspergers and we kept telling them that he does not fit the label and that our ped outright laughed when I told them what they wanted to do. we did their assessment and it showed he had zero chance of having Aspergers but that he was highly gifted.

I was stunned when our advocate informed us that it was clear that this school was not going to work with us and that she suggested we "fib" during the assessment process in order to get him staffed as Aspergers because then they would be required to focus more on getting his needs met. I refused because I did not want my child to be improperly labeled. I also suggest the read MisDiagnosis- excellent book. At one point we had considered driving to Kentucky to meet with Dr. Amend for gifted testing....we set up a phone conference with him and he was So incredibly fascinating to listen to on the phone...he shared that SO many gifted children get misdiagnosed and that you know your child best

this is what I am fearful of happening. I don't know, I'm partially grateful to the school for noticing these things, because they are troubling and my ds does need some help with the socialization, etc.

but the way it is happening makes my stomach a knot. I should get Misdiagnosis today and I'll read it, and study it.

I have read what is available on googlebooks.

Belle, was your child able to get help, even without the Aspie label?? Did you think he needed it?

Rather than rehash, thought I'd offer this thread if you haven't come across it...some discussion of anxiety, depression, adhd, aspergers and how it can all be very confusing.

The suggested neuropsychological eval (from keet's post) is the way to go if at all possible, as it looks at the whole child, environment, etc. rather than just one issue and try to fit it to the child's behavior

http://giftedissues.davidsongifted..../47294/Depression_or_ADHD.html#Post47294

chris1234,
thanks for the link. My ds sounds a lot like yours just from the post--he is very outgoing and social, but doesn't connect with other kids, and I know it bothers him. He tries really hard. He does have some friends at school now, although he still feels awkward around them.

I would say that my son has had depressive episodes, and anxiety. So I am happy that we are getting some help.

I am looking for a neuropsychologist in our area...

thank you.

Hello,
We had a similar experience with the school in that they told us my older son has Aspeger's. Now, I am not positive he does, but I started to look at what they would do for him if he did, and I decided that if he received a formal diagnosis I would make the most of it.

My DS8 gets sensory lab in the mornings for Aspegers. Whether or not he has Aspegers, it is really helping him with sensory over-excitabilities. He is being taught trigger points and how to deal with them. I look at all these coping techniques and feel that I made the right call.:)

This is an interesting point. Man, this is so hard. Does your son know about the label? Or have you not told him kept him from it?

I want to interject something into this thread. Think about the adults you know, perhaps especially hg/pg males, and think about their "position" on the autistic spectrum. I don't know about many of you but there is a significant number of extremely successful people that I know who would be labeled as children but are perfectly smart but odd adults. The fear issue around some of this childhood labeling is destructive.

aline, do you mean that the fear of the labeling is destructive or the labeling is destructive?

I don't know, I think that a child who isn't on the spectrum being treated for something that they don't have *would*/ *could* be very destructive.

Its like everyone treating you like you have a condition that you don't have.

"Don't ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody�"

I think some labels are negative. I was terrified of the labels, but I have found positive support from it and the work that they are doing with my son is great. They think he will not need special ed forever, just a few years to learn what he needs to to be able to cope himself.

To be honest, this is a godsend for me. My father, my brother, and I are all people with hypersensitivities. I can't handle loud noises or too much olfactory input, especially when I'm stressed or tired. But, I was never taught to cope. I am very successful, have never had it fully interfere with me doing my job. My only problem is that I avoid. Since I do not know how to handle myself in these stressful situations, I try not to be in them, rather than having learned how to work past it.:/

I also had hypersensitivities but was able to compensate well enough that it didn't affect my job performance. I also found ways to avoid stressful situations.

Now that I am older and life is unavoidably stressful because of a husband who had cancer, a son that has nightmares that his dad will die soon, a mom who is severely disabled but lives next door and a dad who takes care of her but has health issues of his own. I have to focus on homeschooling my son who is twice exceptional but wonders out loud if he shouldn't be teaching me instead of me trying to teach him and asks if I realize that sometimes he just hates me because I make him wear a painful scoliosis brace and I am the one who tightens the straps. I strive for that feeling of equanimity (just learned that word thanks to my son) but can't seem to find it. My son and I read that happy people who don't let stress get to them live longer and my son is a very good comedian, but even still my blood pressure goes up. I wish I had learned to deal with it better when I was young. I want my son to be able to feel that he can deal with anything that life throws at him and still find a way to be happy and calm. I think he was right and I was wrong a few weeks ago when I yelled at him because I was stressed because we were going to be late for a piano lesson. He stopped and hugged his dog. I said we didn't have time. He said "I'll always have time to stop and hug my dog." He is right. There should always be time for hugs. We will make time for that. The world will not end if we are a few minutes late.