This post is really a vent.
Ahh pull up a chair!
There are days when nothing reallys seems as good as it 'should be' and it drives DS13 and me crazy. That drives DH crazy, because - guess what - we aren't perfect either!
Here's our beef of the moment: At DS's highly reputed public high school it's very rare for kids to go to the top schools. DS is starting to get the feeling that whenever he talks to any adults at the school, their answer to everything is 'oh, don't stress yourself, just drop to a lower track in that subject.' He thinks that there is a 'don't stress yourself' attitude that discourages kids to aim high, and feels 'left out.'
I encouraged him to make some new friends amoung the higher achieving students. I also reminded him that when he grow up, he'll move to a different town, and everyone will be all full of themselves and bragging about their kids (this is where the Monopoly Jr. comes in) and that will be really irritating too - because we have that 'outer directed perfectionists' and we will never be at a loss for things that irritate us.
Now Lorel, I'm not saying that your are being an 'outer directed perfectionist' here. But if you are - embrace it! And I don't know how to make this person more palatable, but if you think of my DS just yearning for a couple of braggy, full of themselves folks to challenge him to aim high, maybe it will help.
I find socially that 'beggers can't be choosers' so if you do decide to keep her on the invite list, perhaps some silly comments that exaggerates the situation might help move the conversation along to the next person.
Good luck either way!
Grinity