Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Toileting accidents typical with gifted children?

In CourtneyB's post about EPGY, she mentioned about the accidents her son is still having in Kindergarten. I'm wondering if this is a typical problem with gifted kids. My DS6 has the same problem. He just does not want to be bothered with bodily functions when he is doing something of interest. He's had two accidents so far this school year (he's in 1st grade). When he was in Kindergarten, he often had accidents on the walk home because he hadn't bothered to go all morning at school. (We only live 3 blocks from school.)

Is this common with gifted kids? And has anyone had success dealing with it?

I can relate. DS5 potty trained himself with #2 at 2 years old. He wouldn't consider going in his pants...but he couldn't bother to go pee. He would go when we told him to or made him, but he would constantly insist he didn't have to go. Life is too fun for him and he doesn't want to stop. He was still getting spots on his pants this summer, just a big spot right in the middle and he would still insist he didn't have to go. It would drive us nuts. I was especially anxious because I was trying to potty train my 2yo DD and instead was trying to make sure that my new 5yo was ready for first grade as he skipped K. I didn't want him to have accidents at school. Anyhow, we still need to ask him if he needs to go and remind him at times, but we don't do it often and he hasn't had any spots on his pants in months. So I guess that is a good thing. And I think he goes in school a few times a day...probably because he gets bored and wants an excuse to go out for a bit. : ) It is quite frustrating though.

Ds5 was fully potty trained at 2 1/3, but he had accidents up until we started homeschooling because he would be so iterested in what he was doing he would not stop to potty until it was too late. I started reminding him to potty every 2 hours or so and that solved the problem (I no longer have to remind him except before long car rides).

DD10 potty trained late and only with a sticker chart and a prize at the end. She was reading fluently, doing math, and had memorized the statistics of the [then] nine planets well before she had any interest in independent pottying.

She needed nighttime pullups well into kindergarten and had accidents in preschool, kinder and first.

DD's asynchrony continues to favor academic pursuits over self-care. Hygiene is for kids that don't read every waking minute, I guess.

ETA: she potty trained late in her 3rd year.

I think it's a kid thing, not a gifted thing. Some kids have accidents and others don't. My ds had his last accident at 4, when he wet the computer chair. I cleaned it up and told him he couldn't use the computer again until the chair dried, and that would take a week or so. Once he had his computer privledges back, he never had another accident.

If your ds has accidents in school, make sure he has a change of clothes at school or in his backpack. Teachers don't like to deal with it, but I guarantee your child is not the only one in his class whose had an accident this year. I work at a school, and I know of at least 2 3rd graders who had accidents this year so far.

It's nice ( I think...) to know that my DS isn't the only one, lol. I always make sure to keep a full change of clothing in his backpack since I am well aware he may occasionally have an accident.

So far the 2 times (I guess that's not bad for 2 1/2 months) she's been very understanding and thanked me for having extra clothes in his backpack.

If I have to next year I'll come *make* him use the bathroom at lunch time every day, lol. We'll see.

My sons had accidents in K & one early in 1st. I've always had the sense it was more personality than giftedness, though.

They had one on the cloth piano bench they sat together in front of the computer once. I had the same consequence as PP mentioned. No computer time for a while. I told them if they weren't old enough to stop to use the bathroom, then maybe they weren't old enough to be allowed to use the computer by themselves.

They are now nearly 8, and I *still* have to remind one of them to go to the bathroom when he is doing the 'pee dance'. Drives me batty that everyone in the room knows he has to go before he clues in. I have NO idea why he is the last to pick up on it.

On the other hand, they both stopped wetting at night shortly after they turned 2, which was 16-18 months before they were toilet trained during the day. Wierd.

Wow, you pretty much described my son there. The only nighttime accidents he has had since 2 1/2-ish were when he just wouldn't get up in the morning to go. But he had accidents daily until at least 4 I would say and then he went large chunks of no accidents followed by up to a week of daily accidents again. I'll have to see if there is something 'new' when that happens or just that he's done going on his own at that point.

My daughter toilet trained at 2 but every so often up until she was 6 or 7 she would wet the bed. She is one of those kids who are "On" or "Off" and she would be so deeply asleep that she wouldn't notice.

DS was trained at 2 and has had only a handful of accidents, with most being due to having a stomach virus. DD wasn't trained til almost 3, and to this day, she still has accidents here and there - some related to being "too busy" and others not.