Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Age or Ability Specific Forums Middle School What I have learned so far...

My daughter will be in seventh grade next year. I'd love to hear from other MS parents and HS parents regarding how they feel now about having a giftie and what their goals are compared to many years ago.

1. My daughter will always be "head of the class". It does not matter what she is given, she will go further into the subject. She has had the option to skip and we did not do it. I do not regret it now that she is a Middle Schooler. Now that I am teaching MS through HS, I realize I don't want her leaving home until she is older. Students are in a better position to learn in elementary school. MS is a battlefield. Acting interested is not "cool".

2. She has gained more from her outside interests. Her favorite times have been at Girl Scouts, DI, and Math Pentathon, where she can be around more people like herself. Girl Scouts is moreso when they are older and the less excelled girls drop out. This is more evident in the cities. There are great programs with NASA and museums.

3. She will eventually learn math, English, Reading, and science at a faster rate than most. Grab every opportunity to give her extras such as Latin, interesting science (such as Robotics), and in-depth Social Studies, Art History, film making and other categories that she will not get anywhere else. She had an Art History program in elementary school that was amazing.

4. She is an introvert. I have finally learned all about this and how to understand her, but really try to teach her to "be mannerly". We work constantly on what is introverted and what is "ignoring people".

5. She does not know where anything she owns is located. Her room is a mess. She likes it this way. She told me when she was three, "Mommy, I know that this is important to you, but it is not to me". I have wasted so much time. Just give me the dirty dishes. This is one side of giftedness. Not all are like this - I am just lucky. For those things for which she needs to keep track - I do. I have a niece like this who scored in the top 1% of the nation on the SAT, but she forgot to turn in her form to National Honor Society so was never a member.

6. She is great at Community Service and this will serve her well for scholarships. She has volunteered more than 75 hours this semester at the Last chance Animal Sanctuary. She really cares deeply about these animals and gives her time and love. This is also a very important trait of gifted children.

I'm not able to contribute to this thread because of my kids' ages, but I'm reading it for the future with great interest. Thanks, Ellipses!

Can you expand on where you found these opportunities? The Art History in elementary sounds like a rare find!
Were the extras formal programs or something else? I'll be keeping my eye out for these kind of things. Thanks!

Wow CFK - this is a great post! Love it. I've never gotten full #'s on my kid and at this point (2nd grade and home schooled) I just feel the #'s wouldn't tell me anything I didn't already know. It is a lot about honing in on learning style and then letting them go.

My 4 year old might be a tougher nut to crack! We'll see!

Yay CFK!!

I'm that person you just described! Stressing entirely too much, worried about making the wrong decisions etc. If only these kids came with a manual!

But you made several very valid points and gave me alot to think about.....Thanks!

CFK - what words of wisdom! Thank you.

I had to come out of lurking to applaud you also CFK!!! Great things to think about. Thanks for sharing.

Yippee CFK!

I've learned that when the children are little, getting them through the day without cripling levels of bordom is the key. Later when they are in Middle and High School, I think it's more about finding ways to motivate them so that they can use their strengths and loves to find a way to tolerate the hard parts.

When they are little it's about learning to get inside their head and seeing if there are 'other exceptionality's' that are getting in their way. When they are older, it's about fanning their internal motivation, and getting them used to making choices.

So interesting!

I concur! That's why when people ask me why I'm HSing, I say "His learning style was very different from PSs." Part of that learning style is a function of his intelligence but only a small part...as you say, many many wayyyy smarter kids function just fine in a PS. Also, even saying that has it's caveats b/c there are HUGE differences amongst schools. There are many schools out there where my DS would have been just fine and thrived...just not in our school.

GO C! I enjoyed your post very much.