Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Starting a Parent Support Group

I'd like to start a parent support group at my sons' school. Any advice or suggestions?

I assume you mean for parents of gifted students. Are you sure there will be enough parents to form a group? Are you sure you want to highlight yourself in such a way?
From experience, I have learned that other parents will often shun those who think their kids are beyond the rest of the group. Not that I discussed this issue with anyone other than teachers, but I received more than a few unsolicited opinions from parents who didn�t �believe in� giftedness or acceleration. They had no idea of our situation, but �knew� it was exaggerated because it didn�t match their own experiences (and since their kids also earned S�s�..). Is there a local or regional group you could join instead?
I�m just concerned here.

Thanks Delbows, you raise some good points. There is no district-wide parent group. I'm estimating at least 60 gifted kids in second through sixth grade at our school. I know there are a few parents who would be interested in a group.
I'm not worried about what other parents might think, my concerns are about best way to reach out to the gifted parents who I don't know personally, confidentiality issues, how to include the gifted teacher.

I have a much more positive take on this. My mom started a group back when I was a kid, and I'm now a member of a 3yo local support group. Both were REALLY helpful. Teachers don't really even know who is a member and who isn't. All parents are welcome to attend--we don't check IQ scores at the door--so there's no bad vibe about it in the schools. And ou group has helped other groups in surrounding areas get started. It's been a fantastic experience!

We do accept members from the geographical area, not just from the public school system, so that might help. It's not a slam on the public schools or anything, and we work very hard not to just go off on them ever. Calm and polite are the watchwords, just as they are in any form of advocacy. The GT coordinators for the schools often attend meetings and they love the forum it provides them. We give an award for "best teacher or adminstrator" who works hardest/best for GT kids. Lots of positive reinforcement! And we have really raised awareness of GT issues in the school system. In the last election, GT issues were discussed by school board candidates. That would NEVER have happened before!

I'd recommend finding a core group you can count on to always attend. Even if they don't do a lot of work for you, having people show up at the meetings is key. There's nothing worse than trying out a new group, only to find that it's you and the organizer and no one else.

Publicity is vital. Getting notes into kids' bags at school is probably your best bet. If you want to include private schools and homeschoolers, too, get info to those groups as well. Post something at the library. Get meeting info into your local paper.

The NAGC (or your state branch of it) can probably offer you some help, too.

Consider what sorts of programs you want to run. Successes for our group have been hosting testing experts to talk about the process and sample results (This was why I realized that DS7 was more than just MG...), "Games Night" for families, summer camp opportunities, math for GT kids, local educational options (private schools, homeschooling, etc.), advocacy 101, perfectionism and underachievement (led by a SENG expert), 2E issues, etc.

We also have a couple people who advocate at the state and national level. That wouldn't be required, but if you have someone who is fired up and wants to do it, it can be a good thing.

A lending library might be nice if you have books about GT kids that you can share.

Some groups even host enrichment classes for GT kids. That might be a good long-term goal if there's nothing like that offered in your area. (Or not...Just tossing it out there!)

I am not the person who started our local group, so I'm not an expert. But I'd be happy to talk more if you think I can help more.

I do think a good support group can make a HUGE difference in a community. Naturally, just having a place to talk to other parents of GT kids helps immensely. And being able to ask questions about the local landscape for GT kids is really useful.

FWIW...

Yeah, my previous post does sound pessimistic but true to our experiences. Even within the local gifted parent summer workshops, more than a couple members (whose children attended different schools) felt the need to criticize our grade or subject acceleration choices. Your school must be quite a bit larger and have a better gifted vibe than our immediate area.
My son�s teachers at his new school (in neighboring big city) are all gifted friendly. Even so, we have been asked to keep plans for further accommodations for next year quiet. I would like to be introduced to other parents of kids like ds, but don�t want to draw attention by asking around.
Best wishes in forming your group!

Sorry, delbows. I didn't mean to sound critical. I was also just stating my experiences. It's good to hear from multiple points-of-view.

No worries! I agree that multiple perspectives are helpful.

I would contact any area school districts that may have a sub-group of their PTA. If you pm me, I can give you a contact for one not to far from us (we don't have one). Our school I've found surprisingly a lot of parents could care less. I think I assumed that if your child has special needs you would be more vested. But I think the same % of gt parents are invested as traditional parents. But it sounds like you have a larger pond too.

My personal reaction is to lose the "support group" language or even thinking. I would think more outcomes/activities. What goals or objectives would such a group have - that sell well and would help get you past the hump of issues already presented (which are real as you know). By merely having a group, the support function would be there. But like an early PTA group, this new group could organize enrichment activities, host a camps/program fair to learn about all local options, sponsor some contests like history day or a spelling bee, create book clubs, etc. Wait, I just took a minute to read Kriston's post - so what she said :-)

You've re-light my fire on this subject. If I can't get it functioning via the school... I should at least talk to the public library about summer program offerings etc. and see if we can't get some things going to make some networks for these kids.

More power to you! Have you seen this already?
http://www.sengifted.org/parents_groups.shtml

Our group is called the "[Area] Parents of Gifted Group."

I don't think you want to be too subtle about it or people won't know why you're there.

It's far worse to hold meetings and have no one come than it is to be the mom who started the GT group. Personally, I recommend against being too worried about social backlash. we've seen none, my mom saw none back in the 70s. If anything, it increased the social connections, since now there were a whole bunch of GT families that you know!

Just MHO...