Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Learning Environments Teacher conference today

Had a conference with DD preschool teacher today. DD went to this preschool for a year when she was 2 1/2-3 1/2. After that, we started HS'ing DS, so we took her out to HS too. Well she is not an easy one to HS at all. So we put her back in the same preschool Feb 1st. And we do have plans to send her to public K in the fall, so I need her to be ready for that classroom situation.

Her teacher told me today that DD is doing great academically, and already knows everything a child going into 1st grade would know. Here comes the BUT......but she's not doing so great behavior wise. She interrupts a lot, gets up to go do something else when the teacher is talking....things like that. I didn't have these issues with DS, he has always been a rule follower. How am I going to send this little fire cracker to school in the fall?

maybe get her an early entrance into 1st?

when does she turn 5?

maybe if her current preschool teacher is willing/able to give her some advance work now, then her "behavior issues" will improve. Does the preschool have a K class she can go to?

This is the same school that DS went to for K and part of 1st. They told me "they don't allow grade skips" and school wasn't just about academics. So that's why we HS our DS. DD isn't as advanced as him (although, no formal testing for her yet). We will probably go back to HSing her for 1st grade. I'm just nervous about spending most of next year in the principals office. LOL

She turned 5 in Jan. And as lovely as her preschool teacher is, so is very disorganized (too much on her plate IMO). DD is only there for 3 hours a day, so I try to do a little afterschooling with her. But like I said....she is difficult, and it has to be on her terms or she won't participate.

The fact is that all kids are still learning how to sit still and how not to interrupt in KG. Your DD won't be the only one interrupting the teacher. My DS did that all year long last year, but he finally calm down in 1st. Kids in 1st however can follow rules better and they can sit still for a longer period of time.

There is also a factor that you have been HSing for a little while and she is not adjusting to the new environment. There are a lot more freedom when she is HS'd versus in school.

Maybe just talk to her and give her a little time?

I agree - that's what kindy is all about. Some kids are learning to tone it down. Some kids need real encouragement to participate at all. Even in 1st grade, there was plenty of energy, enthusiasm, and general squirreliness in my son's class.

I'm probably going to homeschool my 4 year old daughter (will be 5 in the summer) in the fall for kindy. She is EXACTLY like that. Has to be on her terms. My son is so easy compared to the mind games she likes to play. We'll see how that goes!

Ugh. DS6 is exactly the same. He loves to push limits, boundaries, rules, etc. I really hope this will get better with age/maturity??? Until then we have rules clearly set up and hold him accountable. That seems to work pretty well.

Are you HS'ing Hkc75 or sending to public/private? Not to be negative - but DS6, birthday also in January has been in SO much trouble all year in K that I almost regret sending him at all and am seriously thinking about keeping him home with private tutor and 2 parents working with him when possible (we both work). I thought he would "calm down" and not stick out like a sore thumb compared to other boys - boy was I wrong !!! Suspension after suspension - 3 total. I think he's had 12 office referrals and 8 bus referrals to date. School even sent him to the Office of Student Conduct before I knew what was happening! There is still no 504 or IEP for him - and we don't have GIEP officialy in VA either. Just want to warn parents that it can escalate to absolutely drastic situation in NO TIME at all and catch you off guard!! Also want to emphasize that we reached the point of testing this month with the ridiculous situation of almost wanting a "diagnosis" of ADHD or something else - regardless of whether or not it's real - just to protect him in school. In addition - facing ridiculous situation before testing and diagnosis came in of being told by special ed council that they didn't even suspect disability because he is so good at school work/intellectually. Therefore - they felt they didn't ahve to test for anything unless we came back with a diagnosis. Still not clear legally on wehther they have to have a diagnosis first or whether they were just holding off to suit themselves/save money etc. This left us with the option of FBA (Functional Beahvior Assessment) and BIP (Behavior Intervention Plan). I want to emphasise that the psychologist at school was scheduled to be there 11 days out of the month - 4 of which DS6 was suspended - then she was out sick. We got the FBA about a week ago. We are still waiting on the BIP. It's more than half way through the year. You know the situation will drag on at their pace - too slow!!

Furthermore, it means we now have to argue case for 2E very strongly -because they can almost use the fact that he achieves above average in the actual school work - and therefore has no learing disability -against us. That's what they did when we first met about 3 weeks ago. I am the world's biggest ADHD skeptic - so I'm really having to learn a great deal about all the "spectrum disorders" as they like to call them to deal with the diagnosis. A main concern - ADHD and alpha brain waves - where ADHD kids spend thier time, is I believe also where a genius spends their time / Alpha.

I am just so glad that I investigated giftedness first and was on the look out for 2E. Any child that's lively in my opinion, and clearly gifted enough to have a parent writing about them on this blog is in danger of the same thing happening.

Sorry if I've hit too many "issues" in one post - but really - it's been overwhelming and I would like to save any parent what we've gone through in the last 3 months alone.

Short answer - how are you going to send her to school - maybe don't?!!

I completely hear what you are saying, and I'm sorry the school isn't being more helpful to you. We are in Va, too, by the way. I am very scared that by sending her to school next year, that they will squash her spirit, and make her conform to something she isn't(this is the mommy part speaking). But on the the other side, she needs to learn to conform to some sort of group rules(this is the rule following part of me speaking ).

She is determined to get on the bus this fall. Riding the bus is very exciting to her. LOL! How can i argue with that.

Ironmom, I just want to let you know one of the schools dirty little secrets. They will not tell you there are "medical diagnoise"- ie. dyslexa, adhd, nvld, ect. It is imperative that you have an IEE, by a private psy. It is doubly difficult when you have a child who is gifted and can exceed in their academic work. You can then obtain a 504.