Hi--I'm a newbie, but I had to reply to your message. I'm a retired teacher and I know exactly what you mean because we went through the same thing when our son was in K.
When the teacher suggested he go to the Pre K group, I was amazed. He could already read, but she didn't know it until March and she wanted him to go to a class learning their colors....
When she said I was welcome to visit anytime without warning, I took her word for it and did in November. She was very surprised when I appeared. We barely made it through that year.
One visit and I could see part of the problem. It was a multi-age group which I thought would work very well. The class was big with special needs and behavior problems. The teacher's room had lack of coordination and her lessons lacked skill or planning .
When she taught she would teach from one side of the classroom and expect kids to look over their shoulders, around a book shelf and copy what she had written without giving K students any writing experience or letter formation. Then get upset if they fell behind. I've never understood that.
I found out a few years late that she is ADD, but had no understanding of others with special needs...
There were several things that year that made no sense (like the work you mentioned, expecting homework, but she wouldn't ask for it. She said it was their responsiblity...he had only been potty trained for two years, but he had to remember book money, milk money, homework, his jacket etc etc. Sigh....I just asked if she never asked for things, how did she get the library books back ....Her eyes bugged out a little on that one. I think she was used to intimidating people and I was just quietly polite and relentless :-)
The following year, I had him transferred to the district where I taught and things only really improved after he was tested and found to be gifted. Until then, the attitude was that if we would just "get tough" with him, school would be easier. His teacher was a nice, quiet, timid person , but would be upset that he didn't have the pile of worksheets finished each day. She was amazed at his test score and his reading level.So was the principal...
Once our son was tested, things improved. The next year he had a great teacher. Other teachers didn't know what to think about gifted education--even after I had given an after school seminar.
What I learned was that basically, teachers have no idea what to do with gifted children. Many find it very overwhelming when a child knows more than they do (like the moons of Mars at 7 or 8--that bothered the teacher) or a child that can out-think the teacher (and the child be right). I had always found it amazing (I never would have gotten the incubator going without Garrett one year).
When teachers become teachers because they like control, they need another profession. I became a teacher because I love kids and I love teaching (now I guide and I'm learning--I learned Irfanview from our son this year).
The year before I retired, we had a great year! We met the objectives, but we used a variety of ideas. On the money unit, we did a Dollar Store for classes to come to (if we broke even, it was good). This led into economics, supply and demand, decide the price, raise the price, lower the price etc. It was great, but almost every teacher who came there with their class, said "How can you stand this?" or "How do you have time to do this?" They didn't seem to get that children have a variety of ways to learn and that's the fun of it! I loved it. It sure was better than a stack of papers to check (hello--technology? few took their classes to computer lab).
Through his first five years of school-school, once we found out that he was gifted, I had to initiate ideas for him such as acceleration and mentors. I had to find a teacher that would accelerate him. I had to coordinate with a college to start a mentor program (with their Honors College students). If he were still in school--school, I would still be trying to do that.
Things changed when he was going into fifth grade. None of the teachers would allow him mentors (he'd had mentors in geology, astronomy, chemistry, mechanical engineeering etc). They said that he couldn't miss class. No districts had gifted programs and none knew anything about the mentor concept or would allow it.
I decided to retire and homeschool and we love it (though he's a ttteeeeenn nooooowwwww---mostly he's great). He is doing Advanced Placement courses for free online-- a real bargain for college credits. We are part of a group that are all homeschoolers with gifted children (from another city unfortunately) and have had some fantastic field trips with them. Right now I am contacting another college in regard to mentors for computer engineering. He's a real geek (lovingly and respectfully said) that has either self-taught or computer-taught a long list of skills in programming and design. I won't bother to add that list! He needs a mentor to talk the talk of computerese.
So, what you do, you do. See what fits, but you are not alone. The real tragedy is that teachers are NOT trained to work with gifted children (2-5% of the population) and don't know what to do. In this country, our focus is on the TEST and below grade level. Now, the needy children, yes. The test, dump it. Have the principal help and guide teachers. IF they can't then they need to move on to another profession.
Our country is getting behind in this area and now would be a great time to send an email to the Education Dept at national level. I think they'd understand, but the more they hear it, the more of an impression it will make.
OK, I am too wordy and my educational soapbox is put away, but exactly what you were talking about is exactly what we went through. Hang in there. Your child is worth it. Remember the gifted are gifts.
Believe me, I wanted a gifted surgeon...And later, a mechanic for the car. We need them all, but we can't neglect this group.
Karen
