Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Identification, Testing & Assessment At wits end

Ds7 has a full scale IQ at the 99.8 %ile. He has been prone to frustrated induced agression since infancy. Earlier this year i switched him to a smaaler more structured school and it seemed to help. Until this term - they are doing narrative writing which is hard for him and on tbat this week they had swimming lessons every day (an hour in the pool) and had to do an art project that HAD to be finished by Friday. They missed lunch break for swimming and he had to make up writing or art most days.

Anyway yesterday (Friday) he stressed out about art ( he said cutting out about 50 pieces was too hard but the teacher feels she tried to help him manage it) so ended up working through break along with a group of 4 girls. Here it gets tricky. The girls claim he held them by the hair and punched them and threw chairs. He says they wete being noisy an wouldn't be quiet when he asked, that the chair fell when he got up and that he threw his toy and one of the girls got upset because she thought he was going to throw her toy as well. There was no adult present - i can picture him throwing stuff and attacking one kid but four seems a stretch although he can be very strong and agressive at times.

There is something wrong with this kid. On a good day he is lovely but on a bad day he has a hair trigger.

I have banned him from the computer for the weekend - not because i think it will help but because I want him to know I take it seriously. ASD testing was inconclusive but I really think it is anxiety mostly. What tests etc do i need to look it in to.

pm'd you.

(((hugs))) When one of my ds was around 5, he punched the camp bus counselor in the face, because "she wouldn't shut up". Now we know he has a language disorder and obviously people getting in his face and screaming is a hair trigger for him. We had to go over that it's not ever acceptable to ever punch someone in the face, even is someone else crossed into his personal space.

Aggression, face planting and shutting down were DS coping skills. Age and finding other ways for DS to cope seemed to redirect his outbursts, but it is tough.

DD5 has some emotional regulation issues. We've been told to practice a few things- 1) mindful awareness meditation. I'm familiar w/ this b/c there's scientific evidence backing it for use in anxiety, which I have. I have an app and we listen to it every night before bed as practice. It's been slow going but I have seem small indicators she tries to use it in those heated times - she'll stop, close her eyes, take deep breaths. 2) We've been told to try to identify "hot" vs "cold" feelings, what the body feels like, where the muscles are tight, etc. This is meant to get them to start to recognize when they're going down that path so it's easier to go another way.

Hugs. Your stress is palpable. I hope you find relief and an answer.

I think he has some hyper sensitivities. He took until 6 to cope with water on his face, hardly ever had wet pants and has never had a wet be because he hated being wet. I have some sensitivities too and at the end of a long week witb a deadline pressure, writing, and swimming everyday i suspect he was so wound up at the time he was climbing out of his skin and it would have taken just one spark and BOOM. The teacher sees some of as won't control himself rathet tban can't because sometimes he can - but we all have days we are less able to cope that otherbed

Dabrowski's 5 overexcitabilities in gifted children has been eye opening for us