Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Sometimes, he completely drains me.

Today was one of those days. It felt like an entire day of talking DS6 off the ledge and trying to convince him to transition to whatever was next. I feel so beaten down I could cry. It felt like torture by the end of the day. And I was so frustrated from it all that I ended up in a big fight with my sister. Ugh. Will it ever get easier?

It will get different.

Ha! I love puffin's honesty.

Some days are just worse than others. I find we might have a string of days that go smoothly, moments that I think "Wow, we've come a long way!" and then bam! Back to the same old struggles, just slight variations.

Sometimes it helps me to remember life with an infant. Some moments were sweet, but there was also a lot of screaming and misery. Growth spurts, developmental leaps, etc. I have three kids, but I find that I still have to remind myself that when the oldest is being especially difficult that it might just be growing pains of a sort. And that I feel it too because she's not the only one going through it.

Hang in there!

Just...(((hugs)))).

Is your DS about to have a break from school? It sounds like he's exhausted. My kiddos are all much more exhausting, when exhausted.

Hang in there...

The meltdown triggers of the moment are so all-encompassing, I found I would never notice all the things that *weren't* a problem any more. So I often stop and wrack my brain trying to take notice of all the triggers that slowly fell off the list without me consciously realizing they are now gone. This process brings me a lot of relief on days when I want to scream "you're X years old and I'm STILL dealing with with WHAT?!!"

But - - - I don't have to think about which cup I give which kid. or bring dishes when we travel. or worry about having the wrong book or clothes on an overnight, because they pack their own. or worry about using public toilets, or, or, whatever all those things were that used to make me feel just as you describe. As teenage existential angst replaces toddler-style breakdowns (well, most days, anyways), my lists are different, but I'm still making them, and they still really help me get through the bad days. It's always getting better in a bunch of ways, honest! It's just hard to notice, some days.

Platypus, I love that way of viewing things -- things melt away off the list, different things are added. I find I've actually had to point out to DH that doing X isn't such a big deal now. Then, once in a while, when bucket is full for DC, I'm reminded that I forgot to consider how something would be taken (like not giving advance notice).

Thanks, all. Hadn't come back to this thread for a bit but am coming back out of frustration. Tonight, he is bawling (BAWLING!) because daddy tried to help him with a math problem that he was doing for fun. Daddy gave him part of the answer and apparently, he ruined it for DS6. "But I loved that problem, and you ruined it! It was a 'good' problem! I loved that problem!"

No real advice, but I just wanted to offer my empathy and understanding. That's how I feel about my DD5. She's so intense and she's an extrovert to boot and I'm an introvert. I have cried so many times because I feel just worn out and like it's too much for me. One day at a time, sometimes. Good insight from others who have passed this stage.

And the thing is, I posted just this morning that we may have had a breakthrough re irrational fears about nature (thread about fear of outdoor activities). And then he hits us with the math problem drama. Sometimes I just want to get off the rollercoaster.

Man. And we don't even know if he's actually gifted yet. Is it even possible that he's not gifted at this point? He is a bloody poster child for the OEs, that's for sure!

RRD - we don't know if our 5 year old is gifted yet either, in the sense that we haven't had him tested. I guess what I am trying to say is that I don't think it really matters was label you give your son at this point. He is clearly exhibiting so many of the markers of giftedness, and certainly a number of the ones that can be challenging for him and for your family. There is so much wonderful advice on this board from people who have been through similar issues with their children. This is such a kind and supportive community. I know I am new here but from everything I have read I am certain that other posters are genuinely interested in supporting you and don't really care about your son's testing status at this point!

I hope you have a great weekend and that you do end up going for a nice hike in the woods. Hugs to you!