Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion Competitive... and then, not?

Oh man, DS6 is really keeping us guessing!

So... last we knew (as late as two weeks ago), he would always get terribly upset if he didn't "win" at everything. He would have a major meltdown and get mad and want to stop the activity. And if it was a running race with some of the other boys at school, he would come home and obsessively sprint around the house or outside so that he could get faster.

Last night, he announced matter-of-factly that he was the second slowest kid in his class and that only chid X was slower than him. And it isn't lost on him that child X has a physical disability that slows him down. I asked how he felt about that and he shrugged it off and didn't seem upset.

Could this be for real? I don't know if he is getting discouraged and abandoning all hope, or if he is really just ok with accepting that he will likely never be the fastest kid? Can this flip-flop be a gifted child thing? I feel like we never know whether we're coming or going with this kid. He makes my head spin!

I think this is good if he really is not physically gifted. He is recognizing his own strength and weakness.

My son is pretty slow in learning physical thing. Swimming, skating, etc. I am not surprised because I was terrible at any and all physical activity. I am trying to expose him more at this age so maybe he will pass as average when he is older. But I think he can tell that he is not as good at this as he is at many other things.

This, of course, may not apply to your situation at all. But you should have a sense in his running abilities, do you?

seconding Thomas Percy - if your son is being realistic about his abilities, that is an amazing milestone and completely healthy. it would concern me if he was actually very strong in the activity and was curtailing his own potential due to one poor showing. (i do have a bit of a bee in my bonnet about perfectionism because that's been DD8's biggest issue since she was very young!)

i'd keep an eye out for more data points - just file this in the back of your brain for a bit and see if it's a one-off, or part of a larger trend...

DG