Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Where did this child come from.

In the past week I have noticed how much my DS16 has matured over the past two months. Over that time he has gotten his drivers license & gone on a week trip with his high school band. The difference between DS last year at the end of freshman year and this year at the end of sophomore year is HUGE. This is a kid who as a preteen acquaintances would as ask if he was on the spectrum. (I've had 3 psychologists say he is not.. although he does share some characteristics.) At 12 he simply wouldn't talk with anyone he didn't know. Sent him this weekend to his grandparents and I got the most glowing report from them.

I't hard to explain it's not any one thing but lots of little things. He has been off the cuff thanking me for doing normal stuff for him. (Like buying him shampoo before he asks.) He stands straighter, looks people in the eye and has conversations with adults he's never met before. That isn't to say he is perfect or doesn't still have struggles. And I'm not sure the change is just one thing, although I'm sure just growing up in a huge part of it.

But I felt I wanted to share that things are better right now than when I started posting. I've been posting a lot about recently about his 6th grade struggles and I though others would like to hear that things have gotten significantly better.

This is really nice to hear bluemagic:-)

So glad to hear it, Bluemagic! Since we have the same child as you recall, I am more optimistic than I was before reading lol. Although, maybe DS should have gotten his license and gone on his band's one-week trip...but he's going on the French trip next year instead. DS is growing so quickly and is surrounded by not-tall family, he tends not to pull up to his full height and stand straight and tall. Maybe I should start wearing heels to come up to his eye level.

Perhaps our sons are diverging? DS is switching to bass clarinet (though he will still play clari in marching band). Yours?

Yes he is still playing the clarinet. Bought him a nice wood clarinet for his birthday and he is very happy with it. Practicing all the time with no reminders needed at this time. Part the decision to buy the nice instrument was the agreement to stick with clarinet through H.S.

Kids need to make their own decisions of what trips are important and I can understand it being out of the budget to do them all. Part of the reason we did the driving was last summer DS sorely needed something he could feel accomplished and successful and mature. And even though I felt the band trip was a bit silly I sent him because I knew it would be good for him socially.

DS is registered for drivers ed in the fall. Rant alert: his counselor asked me several months ago why DS hadn't taken drivers ed yet. And DS asked me the same question independently. I couldn't believe it. The kids register with their counselors, not with their parents, and we don't have to sign off. Even though we talk about it with our kids, what happens in the counselor's office, stays in the counselor's office. Perhaps he will take it privately this summer, he can't take it through summer school because he is also taking USH. But it would be very time consuming. By taking it in the fall, he gets some free periods during the week in addition to lunch, and that could be a good thing for him. He had half a period free this year, and he needed that.

Oddly, DS did not want to do the band trip (overseas). I knew he wanted to go on the French trip just by the fact that he brought the brochure packet home and left it on the counter where we could see it. It's a nice group going, almost half boys, and he is looking forward to it.

We also bought the nice wood clarinet last year, had it serviced (it was "gently pre-played"), then had it repaired after a fall (grr), so I'm a bit disappointed that he's switching, but glad he's continuing to play and branching out a bit.

Drivers Ed is not done at the school in my area. You have to do it privately. It's one of those things that got cut because of $$. It was the first thing I did when I moved to this stae. The H.S. summer school used to teach it but don't even bother to do that anymore. Most students take the class online. Drivers training is different and that again is done privately.

I had a parent meeting with my child & the counselor this year and got some say into the plan for the next two years. After this we don't meet with the counselor. Although because DS has the 504 I have a bit more contact with his counselor than we would otherwise. DS isn't going to take a heavy load next year, band & marching band count for two classes, two AP's in math & science, English & Spanish. Unlike some of his friends that will trying to take upwards of 4+ AP classes.