Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums General Discussion DS7 going to 3rd or repeat 2nd - maturity?!

I homeschool my DS since newborn. His way of learning as for almost all children is thru playing. He do not like paperwork/seatwork. It is boring and hard (writing - fine motors). He went to private school and finished 2nd with A's and B's. He just turn 7yrs old and we need to move to another place. The Public School want him in 2nd because of age/maturity.

He want to go to 2nd because they have 2 recess time. The 3rd has only 1 recess.

The Pediatrician said to put him in 3rd.

Is He to young to be with 9 and 10 yrs old?!

The school try to get the boys later (as for 6 to enter kinder)

Hi Engmom,
Was it more Bs or more As? Was there a pattern to the Bs? Due to small motor issues, bordom, or difficulty learning? Are there any issues with 'twice exceptionality?'

I like the "Iowa Acceleration Scale Manual" to put numbers on things. Was your son happy in 2nd grade? If he was bored and underachieving, then I strongly discourage repeating. Why did your Pediatrician say to go to 3rd?

Is you son learning to type? My son also hated writing assignments until age 9, when his touchtyping got wonderful.

Particularly since you are new to the area, seems like a good time to move ahead. If possible, set up some playdates with the older boys where you can see him interact, and then you will know better how he will handle the age difference.

Good luck,
Grinity

There are more A's, B in writing cursive and bored. He was not happy, it was a small school and he just want to play with the others kids. But all the kids of his age were "bulling" him because he was not in the correct grade. They did not play fair with him.

He knows how to type.

Thanks for the advice, I will try to set up the playdates.

Did the school actually meet your child? How are they assessing his maturity? I would be inclined to follow the pediatrician's advice since he/she knows your son and what he is capable of.

Actually, I would be inclined to have an evaluation - my pediatrician may be able to make some general observations but an achievement assessment of some kind makes for better "chatting with the school". I think listening to your kid is worth something. We are in a similiar pinch but until we can work out something better - we'll go for some serious time wasting boredom in the name of some happiness. And fight for subject matter jumping... oops me, me, me.

Honestly, I would fear teasing... but we aren't boys here and I don't know what public is really like these days. Is public the only option - something geared to gt would keep you from needing to bump up. Frustrating that it is so hard... sorry. i feel your pain - not literally or i'd be popping flinstones....

Is the school wanting to hold him back just because of his age? If so, then I wouldn't go along with that. Or do they have reasons beyond age?

I suspect maybe we need more information than you're giving us... Or do you really just have two relatively unsupported opinions, without much in the way of supporting evidence? If there's nothing more than opinion, then I'd say you need to do some more talking to find out why the dr. and the school feel as they do. Details matter in this sort of situation!

Regardless, I wouldn't place my child in an inappropriate school setting just so he could have a second recess. I'd put that decision in the "doing what's good for you whether you like it or not" pile, right there with eating your veggies and taking your medicine.

My advice (FWIW): if your child has completed a grade with As & Bs, there should be no reason to repeat it. If you're on this discussion forum, most likely it's because your child is gifted, so there's even less reason to repeat a grade. Maturity will come. Any given elementary school class has varying levels of maturity. There are very few reasons to hold a young child back.

Thank you all for your support and advise. Here is a little more of inf.

The Pediatrician ask my son about school, he answered that he was bored at school. He just want to play. The Pediatrician said he need to be challenge and understand that school is something serious. He heed to learn to work harder. If it is too easy now that he is young then he will be an underachiever and will think school is a joke.

The school indicate that he will be the youngest of the 2nd graders and almost 2 years younger than the 3rd graders. Their experience is that boys are not mature enough to be working and sitting quietly without a recess for 4 or 5 hrs. That the older kids will see him as "odd" and will tease him. Also, he will not be able to finish the schoolwork on time, (he does not like to write - fine motors)

Thanks,

He "need" to learn to work harder. (typo)

engmom,

You're talking to a board full of moms of kids who are sometimes more than 2 yrs younger than grademates. It works. My kids may be seen as odd or teased once in a while, but generally they are well-liked and fit in with their adopted grade.

How will any teasing be worse than the blow to self esteem in having to repeat a grade (especially since he was bored to begin with)?