Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Adventures in Math...Perfectionism VS Total Apathy

So DD11 is a math kid, with a history of extreme perfectionism that was so bad it would take her about 10 minutes of struggle with paralysis before she would attempt in class work. Her teachers went on and on about it and I did what I could to address it, and have had some success.

The latest chapter in the public school saga is her current teacher (who really is kind and wonderful) and her propensity to over do the busywork homework assignments, particularly math worksheets.

Just to be clear, I am a fan of drill and kill for those kids who need it (because many clearly do). Both of my kids, though, are painfully intolerant of repetition and are driven crazy by worksheets.

DD's performance on these math worksheets has been abysmal of late. Recently she scored 10% on one of them. She complains that the math is "stupid and boring, and we learned this a long time ago." She said she rushes through the worksheets to get them done and out of the way, and in doing so she makes careless errors.

I've spoken to the teacher, who now of course doesn't believe DD has mastery, despite her history of above grade testing results and gifted pull-out participation.

I had a chat with DD and told her that as long as she is making careless errors the teacher will continue to think that she has lagging skills and comprehension gaps, so... she needs to make sure she gets the questions right. In other words, if there are too many worksheets and not enough time, not to worry about finishing them, but instead make sure to get all the answers right. (So yes, dear daughter, regress to your old perfectionist ways... sigh).

This sounds like I don't value correct answers, which of course I do, but when you have a kid who formerly couldn't function unless her work was perfect and now you have to tell her to make sure her work is perfect, well... sigh.

ARRRGH!!!!

That's all... I just needed to vent.

Thanks

I feel your pain.

DD missed four points in completing her "health" class (required for graduation) this term.

FOUR.

Three were because of badly written questions (one of which is unmistakably verifiably WRONG) and the other was because she was just plain reading too fast. She completed the entire class in just three days.

Four points. Have I mentioned that?

This was sufficient to drop her grade from an A+ to an A in this course. Really not kidding.

So yeah-- I have this total hate-hate relationship with the school over this kind of thing.

If they supply work, it needs to be of high enough quality that the assessment grades are, you know-- meaningful. Because otherwise, it triggers the very WORST kind of perfectionism, which is why I am so not saying anything about that + to my DD. She cringes every time she sees it. This is not not not good news for a perfectionist. The math woes (which I've complained about lately) have only added to the problems of late.

Grrr.

If it's only, or mainly, homework that's the issue right now, could you act as a buffer for a bit? Let her complete the homework, then you check it before it goes back to school and have her correct any mistakes?

Honestly, scoring 10% sounds more like guessing than like making careless errors, and I might be more inclined to see it as non-compliance than as a work technique issue - but it depends on a lot else so I just throw the thought in for you to see if it chimes.

Here is a post from 2007. While it appears that the link to the source document is no longer active, the poster provided a brief synopsis.

Removal of repetition may be appropriate for differentiating the curriculum and experience for gifted learners.

Here's an idea-- as a means of letting off steam, we've taken to encouraging DD to "enjoy" the CHICKEN-BRAIN* aspects of a variety of assignments that the school seems to think are appropriate/important.

It helps her to be able to let her sarcastic and irreverent side off-leash a bit. We just acknowledge that the task assigned is STUPID, and yes-- a bit pointless. But oh well; we're not always empowered to do as we'd LIKE with this kind of thing.

Then she can focus on compliance without the cognitive dissonance that leads to total rebellion.

* this term comes from "Technically, It's Not my Fault" which is a concrete poetry anthology by John Grandits. It's a GREAT book for gifted kids ages 7-10, and the poem it comes from is about a gifted child being pressured to provide "assistance" to a bully who is none-too-bright. Which he does. By marking the to-be-stolen homework with "chicken-brain" answers, see.

http://www.johngrandits.com/books/technically.php

(Search out "chicken-brain option" in Amazon's book preview and you'll see the critical reference.)

This story sound so familiar from my own youth. I was once caught cheating on my math homework in 7th grade. We had to do long division AGAIN, and so I had schemed to work on it with a friend. My friend did the long division and I did "check your answer" multiplication. But we stupidly did this during study hall.

The teacher never said anything to me, but she did inform my mother that I must not know how to do long division. Who's response what that I was BORED.. had known long division for years, and to please give me HARDER, non repetitive work.

I believe here is what indigo referred to in the previous post -
from NSWAGTC

or here - http://idmforgifted.pbworks.com/f/Research+Synthesis+on+Gifted+Provisions+copy.pdf

Thanks for this, HK -- I just ordered it!

I ordered it last time HK posted it - and DD used one of the poems for a class assignment. It's an awesome book.

Ohhh.... that would make me NUTS... lol. Sorry to hear that happened... how frustrating!!


I wondered that myself... it's either that, or lightening fast sloppy work resulting in mass error, or flagrant non-comprehension and that just doesn't fit at all.