Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Twice Exceptional Help me with email to teacher, please!

{edited}

First of all, your teacher gave you a gift card? I would be flabbergasted if a teacher did that. Ok, just had to get that out of the way.

One thing you could ask about is reducing the written load if he demonstrates he knows the concepts. So let's say there are 20 math problems on a worksheet. Maybe he could just do the even ones? And only do the odd if he has problems with the evens?
Just a thought.

Asking for extended time on work is a good idea, or not being penalized if he turns something in late.

For your last paragraph you could say something like "I noticed that some of his grades on his current report card are quite a bit lower than last year, and I am concerned about why this is. Do you have any insights?"

What grade is he in again? I'm thinking second? I'm just wondering if it's possible that he WAS inattentive last year but the teacher blew it off, because most first graders are kind of off task and wandering around? I think with ADHD, it tends to show up in around second grade because that's when the "normal" kids settle down. So the kids with ADHD tend to stand out. NOT saying he has ADHD, just wondering if his behavior is really worse or if the other kids are maybe more improved than he is?


DD's teacher never had anything all that negative to say about her in first grade even when she wasn't medicated, because no one really expects first graders to be on task. Same thing happened with the kindergarten teacher. She was off-task but so were half of the other kids.

Irena my DS9 has a diagnosis of combined type ADHD and he's not medicated, and I notice a huge difference from year to year depending on the teacher and the classroom dynamic. Imho you are probably absolutely correct when you say your son did not suddenly get worse. It's likely the class/teacher change that is the culprit. Also keep in mind that some teachers are harder markers than others... that could be what's going on as well.

Irena, do I recall right that you were declining to have your DS evaluated for ADHD? I would look into it, in your shoes. If teachers complain about ADHD, they're not always right-- but there is usually *something* going on that can be improved.


I would share only the strategies I would think have a good chance of being effective. But honestly, I would rather call a meeting at school and work out a plan as a team than be feeding the teachers strategies individually.

My strategy would be to contact teacher and principal in a single email and request a meeting with all relevant staff to discuss the teacher's findings. Does your DS already have an IEP or 504? If so, it can be a meeting to amend/refine the existing plan. If not, it can be an RTI meeting.


I would not volunteer this, either. Mainly because I want school to solve problems at school. My DS would feel punished if tons of work came home.


Definitely don't imply that there is busywork. Teachers tend to feel that everything they assign is important.


If there is scribe or aide mandated in the IEP, and they're not providing one, that's a problem to discuss at a team meeting, not in an email with a different teacher, IMO.


What grade are we talking about? Grades have almost no importance in elementary, except as a signaling device. Your teacher is saying there's a problem. Don't worry about fixing the grades, worry about solving the problem.

At least, that's how I'd think about it. Good luck.

A few thoughts:

Attention expectations in 2nd are a lot higher than 1st. Some of the difference in the teacher comments are likely in comparison to expectations.
Second, when a teacher is asking for strategies, she's not asking you to go google for attention strategies, but asking for what you do at home to accommodate. Do you set a timer? Do you give a check list? The teacher has seen dozens of lists of strategies. If you don't use any of the strategies, but have to guess what might work in the classroom, I suspect that's not what she's going for.
If you think his actual behavior is different this year (as opposed to the expectations higher and he hasn't risen to them), I would suggest instead that you say, "we don't really have any issues with attention at home and in looking at typical lists of what techniques are used to address issues, it looks like we don't really use much that I see there. I'm wondering if instead you could talk to Mrs 1st grade teacher to brainstorm strategies? This is the first year we're hearing comments about attention. I'm wondering what Mrs 1st grade teacher might have employed?"

No, I did not decline. The school actually did an eval last year this time. He came up as "at risk" for attention by teacher on the BASQ. Otherwise nothing was really accomplished or discovered. I am n the process of getting an eval for him at ADHD center privately but it takes a while to get the eval. But, we are pursuing an eval for this - it's just still in the works and will be for awhile.


You're right - this sounds like what I should do, actually. Yes he already has an iep.

That was my first though too... But then waivered. Okay, good advice thanks!

Oh, I see. Yeah, that's part of the problem we don't really have those problems at home. He made a checklist for himself so he wouldn't forget anything in morning. He doesn't voluntarily do his homework usually but once I tell him to he does ... not sure if that is normal. He stays on task for his work at home. He seems okay in chess club and mathnasium - I have talked with both instructors and have observed him. I do have to prompt him/remind a little, like I'll ask "Did you do ...." run down the morning/evening routine list. Usually he's done all of it. I don't know. He's my oldest so not sure how normal that is... But he does his routines pretty well I think. However, he doesn't really have any routine chores. I ask him to clean up his mess and he does... He is in charge of clearing his place from the table and he almost always does it. And tidying up after bath (hang his towel, etc) and he does. He does his homework without me standing over him but it's not a lot so ...

Good suggestion... Thank you!