Gifted Issues Discussion homepage Forums Parenting and Advocacy Parent authorization letter-- need a sample ASAP

Anyone have one of these for a university??

I am sure that someone here has done one of these.

The short version of why this is such an urgent request-- my DD's early-round honors decision has hit a snag involving a really significant and ill-timed error on the part of the regular admissions office at {local Uni}.

The upshot is that they let her know THIS MORNING that her application is "not complete" until they get a notice of early graduation from school (check-- counselor scrambled to get one this morning) and a "parent authorization" letter from us. The problem is that they aren't even sure what this latter needs to be or mention or anything. No standard sample or advice on the subject exists.

This is on the heels of them telling her (in writing) on NOv 5 that her application was "complete" incidentally, so yeah-- strings have been pulled. People whose first names are apparently "Dean Of" have been involved, needless to say. Because this is WAY out of the pay scale of the regular office staff at Honors or Admissions. Grrr.

The honors college WILL admit her, they remembered her application quite well (good news-- only ~20% of applicants this year will get one of those letters), but couldn't figure out what was up with the hold at Uni admissions (which, recall, we didn't know about because they had told DD both in writing AND by phone that she was "good to go" there... even KNOWING ABOUT HER AGE...)



Aughhhh.


Anyway-- a sample "parent authorization" letter for a university environment would be MUCH MUCH MUCH appreciated.



Thank you guys in advance.

Oh-- we need to get this to them by the end of the day today. Sooner is DEFINITELY better there, because the deans of two different agencies are involved, and it's the last day before the break... a lot of people will be leaving after lunch.

It is my understanding that "early decision" obligates a student to that institution. This obligation includes the financial obligation. The financial obligation which a student is committing to is NOT contingent upon financial assistance, scholarships, etc. The early decision agreement is a contract to pay (in full, or without regard to a possible financial aid package).

Based on that understanding, the parental permission letter may be required as I believe minors cannot be held to enforcement of a legally signed contract. Something like that.

That's a quick response. Hopefully others will illuminate this further.

I don't think so. I know for a fact that ED requires no obligation from her until May 15.

It's about operating in an "adult" environment, blah-blah-blah, something about understanding that a parent authorizes child to act as an emancipated minor, understands that the uni won't act in loco parentis, stuff like that.

I know WHAT it is for-- I've just never seen one live.

The only other person we know who has is out of cellular range at the moment....

Think that Davidson would know if I called them??

I think that it could not possibly hurt to ask Davidson, even though you're not a member.

I assume that you've done the obvious like googled "{college name} authorization letter"? I suspect that "emancipated minor" and "in loco parentis" would be good phrases to add to a search, since it sounds like they would be likely to be in the text of the letter.

Good luck!

Interesting. I may be wrong but I understood that to be "early action" (non-binding) as opposed to "early decision" (binding).

Most places have their own specific form for this sort of thing-- but "most places" also means community colleges, too.

There's not a lot out there.

Ooh, I have another idea, if calling Davidson doesn't work. See if you can find an educational advocate that's in their office today and might be able to help you.

Couldn't you simply ask them what they want?

Oh, wait!

------------------------------------------

How about

Dear ......

We have been requested to provide a "parent authorization". With this letter we hereby provide the requested "parent authorization".

Sincerely ............


------------------------------------------

That way you can quickly fulfil the request, without knowing more specifically what's being requested. You can worry about what you're authorizing later.

ROFL!!


YES.




Well, so that's what I did. I called and said "Are you SURE that you don't have a form or something for this thing that you are requiring of us, that you've apparently NEVER encountered before, ever-ever?"

Honestly I wound up feeling like I knew a lot more about the legal reasons for this requirement than the person I was on the phone with, for whatever that is worth.

This is the (redacted, obviously) version of what we're giving them. I'll update when I know what their legal department has to say about it (if anything):



The admissions person's version was "I understand that this is an adult learning environment" and "I give my permission for {kid} to enroll at {uni.}"

Which I happen to know leaves out that in loco parentis bit, and is WAY WAY less than most of the local CC's include.

We shall see.

Off to the campus.

Okay-- update is that regular admissions has what they need, and they've admitted her. Which... allows honors college to consider her application.

Problem is that they've already MADE the early round decisions.

I've made it clear to them that this is an unacceptable outcome.

We'll see what happens next.

Unfortunately, the timing of all of this means that DD absolutely cannot afford NOT to apply to three or four other schools, as inconvenient as that would be for us as a family. The Honors College at {state uni} is one thing, but gen-pop at this institution is quite another. The stats on the "average" student there put DD in the top 1-2% of students at the institution, in spite of her age... No way.

Lovely. Well, I guess I wasn't doing anything much with that spare thousand bucks for application fees and score requests... not to mention every weekend until March.


DD has placed a distress call to her summer internship mentor (the one who is primary author on the paper DD's an author on), who responded (even on a Saturday) to express her desire to help and offer to meet with her (and me) on Monday morning first thing-- when office staff will be in place and she can make things happen. This is VERY good news.

You should look at College Confidential. I think I see the answer to your question (if I'm looking at the right school). If that is the case, she will hear by April 1st.

Look at old College Confidential threads to see the Honors College admit stats from past years. You'll get a good idea if she will be "in" or not (though I suspect that she will be in...at most state schools these things are very stats driven).

My eldest got a mailing from a state school in early April. Since she was waffling on her college choice, she applied in early April, was admitted to the Honors College and received merit money. While she did not attend, a lot of state schools will accept kids well after the deadline if they have high stats.

Is there an official university procedure for dealing with mistakes like this one, when the university is at fault?

Apparently not. At least that was the (smug?) word from the honors college minion. I intend to hear that from the dean, however, if that is the answer, and I intend to get it in writing.

Unfortunately, this being Christmas week makes it very challenging to get good information from anyone.

Faculty have been pretty much horrified at the possibility that a kid like her would slip away from the institution because of an error like this-- and we've been clear with the honors college that it's either them, or she won't be attending there at all.

Right now we're scrambling because DD rather stubbornly didn't want to apply to any other big-name schools and the deadlines are pretty much all... on top of us, or already past.

(KIDS.)

I understand that this seems like a relatively minor inconvenience... I do.

This is also how the university seems to be viewing it. "Hey, bummer-- guess we'll have to bump you to the next round of consideration. Sorry about that, we'll probably let you know in March some time."

The problem is that we had her apply early round because WE WILL HAVE TO MOVE elsewhere-- and the only question is whether we ALL go (and rent or sell our home) or if only DD and I do, in which case I will need to be applying for jobs like mad, and we'll need to be going to a place where I can land one. My background is mostly academic, meaning that the hiring cycle IS UPON US. For next August/Sept, I mean.

We are constrained by my DD's disability in ways that even most parents of 15yo would not be. We have to have a certain level of medical care available, and HAVE to have her live off campus.

We fully expect that they WILL admit her to the program. It's just that if they do NOT, then we needed to know that NOW, not in another month or two.

I'm confused a bit because I don't know much about college applications. Can't she just use the Common Application? Or do the colleges all require gobs of extra stuff from each applicant?

ETA: not saying I don't see the massive inconvenience here WRT moving. Argh.

A lot of them do require this that and the other thing, and not everyone uses Common App. That is especially true of the kinds of schools where DD is likely to be a good fit.

At this point, we are NOT going to be able to make the Jan 1-15 deadlines, in all probability, because of the winter break closure and what that will mean for official transcripts and references from her school.

Yes, DH has already been screaming at our 14yo DD for her "laziness" and "stupidity" for only applying to this ONE place... {sigh}

Not helpful, but this is just horrible stress-wise.

All because of her age. EVERYTHING else about her looks like a really high-powered, awesome high-school senior, albeit one that has chosen virtual schooling. That wasn't where the snag happened, though-- it was her age.

I mention that because apparently DD is the YOUNGEST regular admit applicant that the institution has ever had. They've done special admits for students her age, but apparently that is a different process and those students aren't considered "regular admission" students, as most of them are "part time" or "transfer" students affiliated with the community college.

In other words, they didn't HAVE a process-- only a barrier, which they quickly admitted was silly in light of her bonafides, as long as we were able to supply them with documentation (easily done).

The error was that someone should have been able to tell us about this back in November. Earlier, probably, since she contacted them even in October, around the 28th.

She was told that her application was complete, just sit tight and don't worry... you'll know by the end of December.


She also got an e-mail from them to that effect on November 5. It's in both their records and ours-- confirmed by DD herself during her phone calls over this yesterday.

Honestly-- I've been kind of AWED by how well she has advocated for herself on the phone and in person during the past two days. It'd be impressive even from a 17yo extravert, and from a 14yo introvert, it's astonishing to watch.

Don't have much advice but having been through the college application process with my daughter, you have my sympathy. This is a stressful process even when you aren't dealing with a special situation.

Am I understanding the situation correct and if she got into the honors program at this university then you wouldn't need to move?

I suggest you check ALL the details for her applications. For most of my daughters applications, the application needed to be in on ONE particular date. (varied from end Nov - mid Feb) But there was another 2-6 weeks for all the final documentation to be received. For example my daughter was applying to art schools and often the portfolio wasn't required for an additional month after the application.

Good Luck and hang in there.

Worst case scenario. She takes a year off and reapply next year. Could she spend a year interning with her mentor while pursuing other interests and volunteering opportunities?

Her father can take a chill pill and relax.

Am I understanding the situation correct and if she got into the honors program at this university then you wouldn't need to move?

Correct-- and we can use our existing medical support team, our existing network of local connections, and (obviously) continue living and working here.

Which is why this was choice number one.

Oh, not to mention the fact that this will be around 8K a year rather than 50-60k plus living expenses.


Seriously, though, the reason that I mention that is that DD isn't 100% settled on what she wants. Could be math, biophysics, statistics, neuroscience, toxicology, or something else entirely... and at a 60K a year school, she is going to be PAINFULLY conscientious about a desire to push through and graduate in four years. We'd rather that she took five if that's what she needs in order to choose well (if not "rapidly").

Polymath/multipotentiality problem, that. So we were trying to avoid the pressure of a cross-country move and high price-tag "for her" given her innate nature-- that's too much pressure for a 15yo with some socially-prescribed perfectionism, quite frankly.


Oh, there's also an extracurricular (an unusual one) at this institution-- and also at MIT, in an odd coincidence-- where DD has been scouted by a nationally well-known coach. They produce the occasional national champ or Olympian, and my DD is apparently VERY very good at this activity. Already knowing the coach and the facility is huge for her as an introvert.

Exactly-- we never had to do a thing re: dual enrollment stuff this way.

The community college has a specific form for this when the student is below age 16. Fine-- but they have the form. They KNOW-- and always let you know right away.

I wasn't terribly surprised that they wanted something from us-- just that they said "nope, you're good-- now just wait" several times before deciding that they wanted it, ohhhh, a month ago. Surprise!

Yes, we're talking gap year-- this program is a 4yr program, so 'transfer' students come into a different track with the honors college. A gap year will put a kink in some things, and she will probably be ineligible to work with her mentor given the way that grant money supplies funding to the lab, but we'll have to see what the other options are at this point.

We're a little concerned about class size, discussion level, and teaching quality at this institution outside of that honors college. Not sure that we WILL send her there if she's not admitted.

We still expect that she will be. I have one more ace to play, but I hate to do it. We also need the extra time because they have probably never had to consider the kinds of accommodations that DD is going to need on campus. More time is better for EVERYONE there, ahead of orientation and assumptions about on-campus residency for freshman.

Oh, but if we do run through the scenarios and come up with "gap year" we'll probably be looking to move out of state and just establish residency elsewhere in the interim.

This is the best that public has to offer her here, and it's "acceptable" not anything close to-- "Wow, that's awesome."

Academically, I mean.

I can see why going to the local public university if she gets in the honors program would be a good choice at this point. No reason she has to stay all 4 years. I have known several kids who decide they didn't like where they ended up as freshman and have successfully transferred to other schools. Years & years ago my uncle went to university very early, and he spend a year at the state school before moving to Cal Tech.

As to having to 'decide' what you want to do at university. What I have noticed is private schools are often more forgiving that public schools. My local public schools really want to students to settled on a major right away, but a number of private schools don't ALLOW you to declare a major till sophomore year.

I can see why MIT would scout her. It's not unusual for MIT to admit very young college students. And it's a really fun school for the right type of person. (My kids & I got a really fun tour of the place 2 years ago by MIT professor we know.) But I admit it is very expensive, and Cambridge is pricy place to live.

What is almost beyond belief, here? The regular admissions office's requirements meant that I more or less HAD to accompany DD to campus to straighten this out.

Okay, so that fixed, we head over to the honors college, where the adcom has assured DD that all will be well once admissions has acted... that as long as we get it settled "this afternoon" (meaning Fri) that she should be able to get it sorted.

Okay, but since she's 14, the adcom at honors is-- I strongly suspect-- looking for reasons to question her maturity/independence. Me being WITH her was a problem.

Which is crazy. A snag like this-- most 17 and 18yo students would have brought a parent along, too. I wasn't even talking to them (well, at least until the adcom started taking some potshots at her over this being some kind of "lesson" for her, virtual school being the "reason" why she is graduating so "early" etc.) Yeah, at that point, yes I did point out that those statements were unwarranted assumptions. Ultimately, it wound up that well, NO, she wasn't sure that anything was going to be "fixed" at all. MAYBE early next week. As long as it was clear to both of us that they would be doing us a "big favor" in even LOOKING at her application now, since "early round slots" have been FILLED... It was surreally different from what DD had been told (in three separate conversations with the same individuals) over the phone between 9 and noon.

DD's faculty mentor (a full prof in one of the most powerful colleges on campus, and a huge women-in-STEM advocate) is meeting with her this morning... and has promised DD that she will "fix it."

I hope so. If the dean of the honors college refuses to make right the error on the part of Admissions, then the Provost probably will need to learn of it. That's been the private word from faculty and emeritus faculty in our circle of acquaintances. They are universally appalled at how DD was handled.

Honestly, I went with her because I know how administrative stuff works on campuses...

if I hadn't, I lay 80-20 odds that someone in admissions would have magically come up with "the form" that a parent would NEED to sign. (In other words, having to bring it home to us would have meant not getting it settled yesterday-- which, remember, the honors college said was the magical silver bullet to fixing this.) Either that or they'd have decided to tweak some kind of wording on her letter from us, requiring an initialing of changes. KWIM?

We discussed it, and given those odds and what she had been told on the phone, it was necessary for a parent to go with her.

Met with DD's summer internship advisor, who went to bat with THEIR dean... and it sounds as though their dean is on extremely good terms with the dean of the honors college.

Advisor clearly doesn't want to lose DD to another institution.

Update an hour later is that the dean of the honors college is going to render a decision on DD's application and they'll notify her by mail.

Now, personally, I think that they ought to let her know via e-mail given the grief that they've caused her. Oh well. We should know by the middle of next week as if all of this never happened.

(Advisor commented, when told of the "very competitive applicant pool" and "not sure they can make another slot" -- "Oh, {BS}. She WILL get in." That was a pretty great thing to hear after the Friday run-in with the adcom in Honors.)

WHEW.

She's IN!!

I feel a little bit like Dorothy waking up back in Kansas after a major detour to Oz.

DD still doesn't have her letter in hand (as promised to early applicants), so at 4:15 PM on New Year's Eve, she called and sweet talked them into telling her-- well, she actually pointed out that, like any other conscientious applicant, she NEEDED to know whether or not to pull the lever on "additional applications" prior to the deadlines at "midnight."

Apparently the dean thought it was okay to tell her in that case.

Phew! Happy New Year :-)

Congratulations to you both!

Superb, HK! Glad the nauseous process resulted in the right decision being rendered. Happy New Year!

HK, congratulations and good luck!

Good job by you and by your DD! Congratulations!

Congratulations! Enjoy your success.

Woot! Happy new year indeed!

Everything is its right place.

Now she can tell her father "I told you so."

Indeed. More time for scholarship applications.



She's also telling her other parent; "Sooooo... about my new smart-phone..."

Dad really gets played by the Ninja Princess sometimes. Me, though, I keep my mouth shut because he has some of this coming to him.

Glad to hear she got in. I notice it's the administrators not the faculty that were the problem.

Sorry, just saw this. Good news - you must be so relieved!

Howler, that's fabulous news. Congrats to your DD and to you for serious problem-solving.

At what point do you have to start a new round of negotiations for accommodations? Or is that all set?

DeeDee

Good to hear it worked out.

I'd be curious to hear how you chose this educational option over the other (potential) options.

Well, it will be a matter of needing to mention that when we inform them that no, she won't be living on campus. Luckily, there is a "residential" loophole for kids who live here in town, so really, it doesn't strictly REQUIRE a 504 plan line item anyway. That's as we planned it, truly; it was certainly a factor as we began looking at full-spectrum universities. Many, many of them have gone to mandating freshman on-campus residency, which is not going to work well for someone like DD who is both very much underage (will barely be 15 next August at move-in) and also has to have a secure area to prepare her own meals where her food allergens are NEVER present, given her sensitivity to some of those allergens.

We didn't want those two things to be front-and-center socially for her in the explanation of "ohhhhh-- you don't live in the dorms? How's THAT work?"






As I've said in little bits here and there-- we had several factors to consider beyond DD's basic personality/learning style (she's socially adroit, but not very autodidactic in innate style, so a smaller kind of learning environment would be best);

A. Polymath without a clear sense of what she plans to pursue. Just that she wants to explore and choose something in each of at least a couple of diverse fields. For some time, that was pre-law and ?? and now it seems to be electrical engineering and... biophysics? math? neuroscience? psychology? She needs a place that offers a wide enough variety-- and preferably has research opportunities available in a lot of areas, so "full-service" research uni, especially since she has interests both in STEM and arts/humanities. There aren't a LOT of private college options that bridge that well.

B. Cost-- this is a factor because we are paying out of pocket, and thanks to her disability's mandates, I have not been working full time for the past decade. I can start, of course-- and that pays for her tuition. But she's keenly aware of the high costs of college. In other words, she needed a place where she didn't feel TOO much pressure to choose The Major For Me within the first six weeks, and doesn't feel CRUSHING pressure to finish in just four years (or less)... this was a major strike against HMC and MIT... and it wasn't the only one, as noted above and below... okay, so this was a point in favor of in-state tuition at a public university. Which we happen to have in our backyard, so to speak.

C. Had to be local to us (at least 1-3 hr driving distance) or we were going to have to face selling our house in a down market, and BOTH of us looking for work in a new location-- probably a LONG way from where we are now. The closest of those other schools was 7 hr by car. If DD and I moved alone, that one at least was "driving distance" but the others would have meant flights. DD has a great deal of difficulty flying-- the reality is that she would not have come home while she was in college unless "home" meant we moved to where she attended.

D. Moving away from the region would mean losing: a) knowledge of safe/safe enough restaurant options, safe brands of prepared food (about 50-60% of them are local/regional in distribution). While this doesn't sound awful this really sucks socially and convenience-wise. Learning how to eat safely again in a new geographic location 3K miles away is a tall order. It takes years to get to know how to navigate that well, and it often involves knowing which little independent stores stock which brands and sizes. This also has profound social consequences, since any offers to "go to ___________ coffeeshop/cafe/restaurant" need to be carefully weighed, and if they are truly unknown, the risk is generally not worth the immediate benefit; often the answer is "No, sorry... {excuse}" (because I need to see what all is on their menu before I can even step foot in there)




E. Honors college gets around the "needs small interactive environment" as it runs headlong into "large research institution with graduate research in multiple areas." This is one of the few programs housed in STEM-- not humanities-- colleges, meaning that there are as many STEM offerings in honors as there are humanities courses, and the quality is high. Too often the honors college is run from the liberal arts/humanities side and quality suffers in the STEM honors offerings, or there are relatively few STEM majors in the honors program. Not so here. Definite point in the program's favor.

One of the other bonuses is the one that Dee Dee asked about-- dealing with the accommodations package. We may wait until we know something more about DD's possible needs re: CTD (possible EDS) but we have dealt with the disability services/compliance office on this campus over the past ten years when my DD was doing summer programs there.

We also have one of the best specialists in the country (seriously, I think he is among the top 100, and he has known my DD since she was two), and that means that to equal her care on that front, we'd need to be near Chicago, Denver, Dallas, or in the mid-Atlantic states.

Complicated answer, I know. Idiosyncratic. The academics part of things was only about 30-40% of the input stream for decision-making.



She is comfortable on this campus-- and at 15yo, that's a big deal. She knows the town itself very well, which will help her socially with her classmates from out of the area (who don't).

Thanks for the explanation. That list of reasons looks so overwhelming, I'm surprised any other options were even in contention.

I think for young college entrants in general (even without any medical issues) there can be a strong case for staying local.

Sounds like a great solution. I'm so glad you made it work!

Me too, DeeDee.

22B, I have to be honest here and say that we do have some misgivings about not moving to Boston... hope that we're doing the right thing.

We'd joked for a long time that we were going to go with the "Eppes" model for higher ed (from Numb3rs-- because Charlie moves away with Mom to go to college since he is so underage?).

Ultimately, I thought that the costs (both financial and otherwise) of MIT/HMC were going to be too extreme in terms of pressure upon our 15yo perfectionist. I know her interior landscape better than my DH does, but he ultimately deferred to me there.

That is not to say that MIT and HMC were not on our short-list. Both institutions were very much in the top 4; my DH actually ranked MIT #1 in his mind, and I know that he was disappointed not to have an acceptance to at least hold to his heart and revel in. She didn't finish applying there, however, as she refused to go through the SAT II's that she needed, and I could hardly blame her. Our local testing coordinator made testing with accommodations nightmarish for her. Truly awful, awful stuff-- like the kinds of things that Irena posted about today. Just awful.

Reed, U of O, Macalester and UW were also on our short-list, and Brandeis and RPI were on hers, but there were flaws with all of those in one way or another.

We're HOPING that this winds up being rigorous enough for her. If it isn't, we'll move to plan B, which is for her to transfer somewhere with a bit more ooomph after a stellar freshman year.

Save MIT for grad school?

Maybe so-- probably her plan if she sticks with EE.

I agree.

And there is also the possibility to transfer to another school in two or three years if she feels she has outgrown this particular school & program. Sounds like you are making a good decision for the current situation.

I'm sorry to hear you had to experience a near panic run around. I'm afraid our family experienced far too many scenarios of thinking everything was "done" only to learn later when we checked online that something was yet needed that wasn't previously mentioned. We've learned to triple check everything involving anything to do with colleges. As has been stated, if it's a "typical" scenario they seem to do alright most of the time, however, any situation that is even a little out of the normal seems to throw them for a loop. I think often colleges will have students working in their offices who know just enough to be dangerous

I understand the thought pattern of colleges that the student needs to be the one ironing out much of what goes on with the college they'll be attending, however, often times there is too much at stake to leave it to chance in any manner. There is a time to learn hard lessons and a time to do whatever it takes to get it right. Often times a failure to iron out a matter may mean the difference of graduating in 4 years, or going another semester or year....that's a damn expensive lesson and one I don't care to absorb if I can avoid it.

^ Yes. The exact reason that I posted how this all happened-- and how it (eventually) got ironed out; this is a story that has more use than mere anecdote for this group of parents in particular, though. MANY of us will be guiding our kids into college at younger-than-typical ages. A fair number want some sort of documentation from parents when those students are under 17 years of age upon matriculation. We even knew that going in, and this still happened to us because we got bad data from official offices.

Sheer bad luck on DD's part, really-- as she DID do due diligence on follow-up-- twice. She just got minsinformation on three (or was it four) different occasions, and the "bad luck" part was that it all seemed to align to suggest that they didn't need anything else.

But it's a good point-- if she'd been 17, of course we'd have dealt with a lot of this given the stakes involved. Because she's 14, on the other hand, we had to let her do the "dealing" with it lest they think her "immature." Ironic.