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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 1,032
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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 1,032 |
Not wanting to try something that he knows he will have a tough time with has been an ongoing challenge for my dyspraxic ds13. It took me quite a few years to realize he actually had a good intuition about the kinds of tasks which would be extroadinarily challenging for him compared to my expectations of neurotypical kids. Over time we've worked out a combination that helps us through the fear of failure preventing a start - I listen and ask ds questions to talk him through all the possible things that might happen if he tries and it doesn't work, as well as talking him through the basics of how to do whatever it is - and I'm talking really basic here. So that's ds' role in the system - he talks his fears over with me and that sometimes lessens them, and I help him mentally prepare by talking through how I, as a nt person, would approach and accomplish a task. A lot of the time he will give me feedback about some little tiny something that just doesn't work for him. One example is that he can't spit - that came up as a reason for not wanting to try something else that was so far-flung from spitting at first glance I never would have guessed he was thinking about it. The second part of this combo is my end of the deal - I need to remember that some very simple things involving coordination of body movements are not only not second nature for kids with dyspraxia, they can be very very difficult and take much more repetition than for a nt child to learn, and some movements might never become "automatic". I need to learn to do what you do! DS has such ...interesting... difficulties with some things, and even before I learned the words "apraxia" and "dyspraxia", I had eventually began to tell people that he had a lack of kinesthesia. A good, solid approach like yours might be just the ticket!
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,428
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,428 |
DD9 is not diagnosed with any LD issues but has never been very coordinated and has anxiety. When we taught her to bike, which was one of THE HARDEST parenting tasks I have undertaken thus far!!, I finally just stopped saying anything to her and simply held the back of the bike for her when she asked and let go when she asked. I did not offer any advice at all. She had to figure it out herself. She is very stubborn and lashes out at anyone nearby when afraid. She did learn. She was 7.
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,428
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,428 |
We also bought knee and elbow pads and practiced on a well-mown, flat grassy field.
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,428
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Joined: Aug 2010
Posts: 3,428 |
You know, it's not fair of me to even say she's not coordinated now. I would have once said she was in the bottom 15% for athleticism. Now I would put her at the 30th-40th% or so. As with many things with DD, we have seen a slow but steady improvement with age. We do keep her pretty active.
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Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 5,181
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Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 5,181 |
DD9 is not diagnosed with any LD issues but has never been very coordinated and has anxiety. When we taught her to bike, which was one of THE HARDEST parenting tasks I have undertaken thus far!!, I finally just stopped saying anything to her and simply held the back of the bike for her when she asked and let go when she asked. I did not offer any advice at all. She had to figure it out herself. She is very stubborn and lashes out at anyone nearby when afraid. She did learn. She was 7. YES. Our DD was 8, nearly 9 before we pressed her to really learn.
Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 1,032
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Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 1,032 |
Just wanted to add that DS10 learned to ride his bike last weekend, and it was virtually painless. I cleaned it up and aired up the tires a couple weeks ago, and it's been sitting there waiting for him to talk himself into it. I suggested offhand that the evening had cooled off and we ought to try his bike, on Saturday night, and to my surprise, he agreed. He got on, had a horrible time initially with trying to get his second foot on the pedal, and I saw that the seat was way too low. Not surprising, since he won that bike when he was in first grade (way too big for him then). So I raised the seat, and he got on and just took off! He had some wobbly moments, figuring out how to steer and pedal at the same time, but he did really well. He rode around until it was too dark to see. Sunday, he rode across town (2 miles) to his friend's house, and rode back with his friend to play in the river. Friend took off later with another friend, and he went out around town to find them. I can't believe he could still move on Monday. It was like he built up this wall in his head all these years, and when he went to push it over, it was just a house of cards. He's ready to tackle swimming now. Summer just got a whole lot bigger!
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,498
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 2,498 |
Nautigal: oh, that's lovely!
DeeDee
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Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,390
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Joined: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,390 |
We have two balance bikes on the way to us, so I'll need to report back once we have them and can try them out. Reporting back, both the bikes we ordered were too small, although the one we ordered for DD9 actually fits DS5 pretty well. That said, DD9 was able to glide for a few seconds on hers right out of the gate. Even though it's really too small, we're going to let her use it to practice for a bit before she passes it on to DS5. We'll probably get a "regular" bike for her and take the pedals off.
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