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Moving to Toronto end of school year. And it has been a year of serious change already for DD, losing her father.

One of the deals I have made since this is a tough move, is that she can try out for commercials. She does serious dance, 4 classes at least a week, pre professional level.

So I said that I would not take her to any general audition, if she gets a dance commercial, she can do it. And I was looking at these talent agencies and sending off an emails, blah, blah, blah. And I see a voice over agency. And my thought, since I was in the mode, she is extremely articulate and has doesn't have Canadian accent, that she could do commercials. And sent it off and told her before I could stop myself.

I really don't want her to work. But I am finding this is motivating her more than other things. I really want her to work for her best in dance, since that is her chosen extracurricular. But she isn't doing it just for the sake of dance. The thought of doing commercials is more motivating.

So I am perplexed. I want her to find a drive, and yet her drive is getting paid and being on TV. Maybe she is too spoiled already and I have ruined her chance at self motivation. Feedback on experience is appreciated.

Well, it could just be that she sees it as a logical stepping stone for other acting work, or a way to build craft in a direction that is both versatile and novel to her.

True?

I have been occasionally surprised at what seems to provide uncharacteristically-- sometimes even disproportionately so-- motivation to DD.

Often it comes down to "I was thinking that it would be ____, and it turns out that I was thinking that because of a lack of life experience" but most of those things are things that DD doesn't seem to readily articulate, even when we try to understand suspiciously enthusiastic behavior.

Well, it sounds like you know what I mean by that last statement.

I've found that mostly it is the case that DD is making a VERY particular assumption about what is in it for her-- and it really would be best if she'd share her vision with us, because honestly, sometimes she has no idea what she is getting herself into.

I guess I'm saying that without actually being in her head, you don't really know whether its the prospect of a step into the adult (paying) world, the notion of working with professional actors and directors and producers, or something else entirely (I have a dream of wearing a monkey suit on national television).

No way to know.
My DD did a bit of regional voice-work at 6-9 yo, and I did too at ages 3-5 because of connections in commercial radio at the time. It was low-pressure and fun. DD especially enjoyed the technical toys that the audio engineers had. She loved that part of things, and she and they often had fun tweaking her voice and digitally cut-and-pasting things. It was like playing with photoshop but in an auditory landscape.

I do hope that she has fun and is happy doing it! DD decided on her own at 10 that she didn't want to do it anymore, and hasn't since. It was evidently a short-lived phase for her, but she doesn't really have a fine/performing arts passion.

I am so very sorry about the loss of your DD's father. My deepest sympathy.

Are you sure that your DD is driven by the desire for money and fame? My DD just loves, loves, loves performing. She recently joined a local musical theater group and is thrilled with even a chorus part. With all her 2E issues it has been great having an outlet that feeds her strengths. Last month she spent 4 days shooting a movie - a thesis project for a student film maker. She had a fabulous time - loved every minute of it. She was not paid and will not become famous. She doesn't care - she just really enjoys doing it.

A number of kids from this musical theater group are signed with an agency and go on auditions for commercials, etc. I have a very good friend whose daughter started doing commercials as a baby and even had a leading role in a major movie when she was in elementary school. She hasn't worked much as she has gotten older but is still totally motivated to take classes (acting, dancing and singing). If your DD enjoys it my feeling is to indulge her. Just because she wants to do this and you allow her to go on auditions it doesn't mean she will be cast. Just because she is cast doesn't mean she will actually want to continue doing it. The audition process is very boring and very humbling - there is a lot of rejection. Filming is not nearly as exciting as it seems. DD sat for hours sometimes between filming scenes. Luckily she enjoyed it and was fascinated by the process. Most of the other kids just wanted to play - lots of frisbee, basketball and 4 square. One kid quit the second day.

Your DD has had a tough year. It may be a good thing if she finds an outlet for using some of the emotions she is experiencing. HTH

My daughter (10) wants to do commercials, too. Apparently as a route to acting in bigger things.

She's not spoiled, so it's not a spoiled thing.

Right now, she's content to do local theater.

Thanks for the input. She does want money, but the concept of fame is in there heavily.

I feel better by letting her try it, reading your posts. I am sure it is a passing phase.

Wren, I'd let her try it if she's interested in it. I wouldn't worry about future motivations - she's 8 years old, I think, isn't that right? My children and their passions/motivations/everything changed soooo so very much between 8 and the pre-teen to early teens. This might be a phase, or it might not, but there's really no way to know now, and jmo, the most important thing we can give our children when they are young is the chance to explore the things they are interested in and most importantly, to have fun.

Let us know how it goes!

polarbear